Conifaser 

Connoisseur of Connifers

Oh wow, beautiful conifers, you must be a Conifaser

Conifaser by Leaf-Hosting July 6, 2021

coniferophilia 

(Noun)
(1) (biology) a profound interest in conifers: cone-bearing seed plants with vascular tissue, better known as pine trees, cedars, firs, redwoods, spruces...

(2) (psychiatry) a type of dendrophilia, i.e. sexual attraction to trees, more specifically conifers. Dendrophilia is a paraphilia. Paraphilic dendrophiliacs and coniferophiliacs are aroused by trees and sometimes want to have sexual contact with them. Extremely rare.

- "How come you know so much about pines?"
- "Actually, I was talking about spruces, Jerry. But anyway, I'm a coniferophiliac, really."
- "What the hell? You wanna fuck trees??"
- "No, no, no, it just means I am interested in conifers."
- "That's not what Urban Dictionary says."

coniferophilia by Monticello-W October 18, 2016

Coniferus Nipplepuffin 

A medical condition where the nipples puff out due to enlarged breast buds.

OMG look at my nipples! Must be a case of coniferus nipplepuffin.

Coniferus Nipplepuffin by iexist89 February 26, 2010

confuser

the term for a computer used by someone who has trouble using them.

"how do you turn the confuser off? do i just pull the plug out of the wall?"

confuser by el_ectra May 27, 2007

Conifer 

1) A place for pot smoking hippies to live in their later years.
2) The birthplace of one of South Parks' creators.
3) Famous for the school's 2 page dedication to parties/drugs in school in the yearbook.
4. A place where if you don't smoke pot...You will be forced to.

-Wanna go to Conifer?
-Why?
-You know why...

Conifer by Bri? February 20, 2009

Confuser

A confuser is someone who you are attracted to despite not usually fancying someone of that gender

Dave: I usually like girls but I do have a bit of a thing for Johnny Depp
Hazel: Oh, he's your confuser. Mine is Drew Barrymore

Confuser by badbumblebee March 9, 2010

conifer jumping 

The art of jumping onto a coniferous tree (preferably in ur own back yard) and riding it as it falls from ur weight, to the floor. be wary of spiders hidden in the conifer if u have a fear of them and try to make sure the conifer is atleast 2 foot TALLER then urself (and dont over jump it). if u happen to be rather fat also be aware of the speed u will drop to the floor and if ur rather thin u may bounce back it helps if ur under the influence of alcohol, but i wudnt try drinking whilst jumping. If u have any neighbours that can clearly see u jumping on ur conifer dont forget to invite them to join, its guaranteed to win u plenty of friends. such act is also accociated with stair surfin and remember whatever u do, dont look back and never let go, happy jumping.

person #1:this party is boring hey have u got a conifer in ur garden?
house owner:yes why?
person #1:o no reason...
person #1:wanna go conifer jumping
person #2:sure!

the next day...

person #1:what happened my head hurts
person #2:i think u landed on ur head
person #1:doing what?
person #2:i dont remember...

conifer jumping by James AC August 30, 2006