Aubergine Axolotl 

The aubergine axolotl, also known by the scientific name of Ambystoma melongena, is an elusive amphibian, a lover of caves and other fresh, humid environments in general. As the name itself suggests, the aubergine axolotl would appear as a quadrupedal animal, physiognomically identical to an axolotl, but characterized by a more rounded body, with intense purple pigmentation and the typical aubergine petiole where the tail should be located. An adult individual can measure up to 30cm and weigh between 1.5kg and 2kg. Characterized by an ungainly gait accompanied by the "Pillar's Men Theme" in the background, it is a species in danger of extinction. The researchers would all agree on the fact that the decimation of the number of individuals was induced by the disproportionate use of the same in Italian cuisine, especially in the South, for the creation of dishes such as aubergine parmigiana or the simpler grilled aubergines.

To date, the reproductive mechanism of the animal has not been defined, since there have been few contacts with it (not to mention the fact that all the aubergine axolotls studied were eaten as a snack between one break and another)

(Pillar’s Men Theme in background)

A: WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT?!

B: Bro, IT’S AN AUBERGINE AXOLOTL!

A: O MY GOOOOOOOOOOOD!

A e B do a Jojo Pose with aubergine axolotl

Aubergine Axolotl by El Basurero October 9, 2023