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Magical Mr. Mistoffelees

You ought to know Mr. Mistoffelees!
The Original Conjuring Cat--
(There can be no doubt about that).
Please listen to me and don't scoff. All his
Inventions are off his own bat.
There's no such Cat in the metropolis;
He holds all the patent monopolies
For performing suprising illusions
And creating eccentric confusions.
At prestidigitation
And at legerdemain
He'll defy examination
And deceive you again.
The greatest magicians have something to learn
From Mr. Mistoffelees' Conjuring Turn.
Presto!
Away we go!
And we all say: OH!
Well I never!
Was there ever
A Cat so clever
As Magical Mr. Mistoffelees!

He is quiet and small, he is black
From his ears to the tip of his tail;
He can creep through the tiniest crack,
He can walk on the narrowest rail.
He can pick any card from a pack,
He is equally cunning with dice;
He is always deceiving you into believing
That he's only hunting for mice.
He can play any trick with a cork
Or a spoon and a bit of fish-paste;
If you look for a knife or a fork
And you think it is merely misplaced--
You have seen it one moment, and then it is gawn!
But you'll find it next week lying out on the lawn.

And we all say: OH!
Well I never!
Was there ever
A Cat so clever
As Magical Mr. Mistoffelees!

His manner is vague and aloof,
You would think there was nobody shyer--
But his voice has been heard on the roof
When he was curled up by the fire.
And he's sometimes been heard by the fire
When he was about on the roof--
(At least we all heard that somebody purred)
Which is incontestable proof
Of his singular magical powers:
And I have known the family to call
Him in from the garden for hours,
While he was asleep in the hall.
And not long ago this phenomenal Cat
Produced seven kittens right out of a hat!
And we all said: OH!
Well I never!
Did you ever
Know a Cat so clever
As Magical Mr. Mistoffelees!
by Mainiac June 12, 2005
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44 magnum

A pretty powerful pistol. Highly popularized in the Dirty Harry movies and described as "the most powerful handgun in the world" even though it was not.
I know what you're thinking. "Did he fire six shots or only five?" Well, to tell you the truth, in all this excitement I kind of lost track myself. But being as this is a .44 Magnum, the most powerful handgun in the world, and would blow your head clean off, you've got to ask yourself a question: Do I feel lucky? Well, do ya, punk? -- Dirty Harry (1971).
by JurisDoctorJ January 6, 2008
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Related Words
Maggie maggot Magnus Maga Magic mag magnum magoo magnet Magic Carpet Ride

Magar

A marijuana cigar that is wrapped with dried fan leaves from the cannabis plant, meaning there is zero tobacco.
Dude did you see Paul from Tokin Daily puff down that shweeeeeeeet Magar???
by Guru Jack Llama Romeo December 17, 2011
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Mayonnaise Maggot

"These Mayonnaise Maggots are gonna stop harassing us. Or else."
by IBTAL May 8, 2020
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magical negro

A token black guy in films who fills the stereotype of being impossibly old, wise and sometimes able to actually perform magic. Usually the magical negro is there to give guidance to the main white hero, which may explain why the magical negro stereotype is most popular in movies geared toward a white audience.

Some examples of recent popular negros are:
Chef from South Park, Morgan Freeman, Oracle from the Matrix and Barack Obama.

Some non- black magical negros:
Mr. Miyagi, Jackie Chan, Pai Mei
Hero: Oh no! I have to defeat my enemy and save the world from certain destruction!

Abraham: don' worry chile, im a wise ole sage heeuh tah help ya through alla yo struggles.

Hero: Thank you magical negro, I suddenly feel a lot better. See you at the end of the movie! (walks off to begin quest)

Abraham: crazy chile' (smiles and shakes head reminescing, then disappears in a cloud of smoke)
by Magicalnegro August 15, 2011
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Maga tinamu

Mahn-gai chi-nah-moo

Fijian swear figuratively translated as fuck your mother. Literally translated as mother's vagina 2nd person possessive, "your mother's vagina."

The worst swear in Fijian.
You get hit by a flying beer bottle and say "maga tinamu" to the Fijian guy and start the fight.
by Fijimanz June 11, 2011
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Magneto

Magneto is a fictional character that appears in American comic books published by Marvel Comics, as well as in a number of television, movie, and videogame adaptations; most often in fiction related to the X-Men. Created in 1963 by Stan Lee and Jack Kirby, Magneto is the X-Men's first and most famous adversary.

Magneto is a member of a fictional subspecies of humanity known as "mutants", who are born with superhuman abilities. Magneto can generate and manipulate magnetic fields, which gives him power over metal objects. A Jewish Holocaust survivor, Magneto is driven to protect the mutant race from suffering a similar fate. His role in comics has varied from supervillain to antihero to superhero.
Magneto first appeared in the debut issue of X-Men in 1963, along with the titular team. Through the decades from the 1960s, Magneto has appeared in several issues of the original X-Men series, generally known as Uncanny X-Men, as well as in such spin-offs as X-Men, Astonishing X-Men, Alpha Flight, Cable, Excalibur, The New Mutants, many X-Men miniseries, and several other Marvel titles. His first solo title was a one-shot special, Magneto: The Twisting of a Soul #0 (September 1993), published when the character returned from a brief absence; it reprinted Magneto-based stories from Classic X-Men #12 & 19 (August 1987 & March 1988), by writer Chris Claremont and artist John Bolton.
by The Centurion December 31, 2014
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