Dream Canoe

A person considered exceptionally good looking and enjoys banter. Must be a minimum of 5’8 ft.

Dude, That Hazel sure is such a dream canoe.

by Dreamyboat July 28, 2024

douche canoe

someone who is the worst person, so much that they're as bad as several douches combined

"Ugh, I really hate him."
"I know right? He's such a douche canoe."

by Bitch Canoe December 12, 2023

Douche Canoe

A sad or pathetic gentlemen who opens his mouth wide as his woman douches her vagina and he catches it in his mouth. A terrible person. A sad excuse for a man

That guy is being a total douche canoe because he got fired for always being late

by Bornsooner May 11, 2024

Mobile Canoodling

When 2 people jork it on the phone with other for a long period of time (depends on your stamina) ((long is more than 2-5 minutes)) it can be used for long distance couples or e-whores so they can get that bag. Either way it's kinda okay, but you must make sure you talk to one another during this process or it is weird and pointless, you might as well just watch porn.

downside: not as pleasuring
benefit: 0% chance of std or pregnancy

Girl A: "Omg girl, you're never gonna believe who I was mobile canoodling with last night"
Girl B: "Omg was it Austin again?"

by melodixx January 8, 2025

Douche Canoe

A douche in a canoe ...
An asshole (mainly Men!)

Stop being such a fucking douche canoe 🛶

You're such a douche canoe!

You're the Biggest Douche in the littlest canoe!!

by ziacs January 31, 2026

Douche Canoe

Douche Canoe (noun): A self-absorbed, obnoxious individual who drifts through life on a raft of arrogance, bad takes, and an utter lack of self-awareness. Often mistaken for a human, but upon closer inspection, closely resembles a sentient, poorly groomed toe with an attitude problem because he likely sat on a pinecone.

Example: Kyle, the human embodiment of a stubbed toe, leaned back in his chair, manspreading like he was claiming land, and loudly explaining why everyone else was wrong about literally everything. Between flexing his "elite genetics" (despite looking like a swollen big toe) and hitting on anything that moved, he remained blissfully unaware that the entire room was desperately hoping for a strong gust of wind to carry his douche canoe far, far away.

by Sassenach March 14, 2025

Douche canoe

An arrogant ignorant individual that is causing the rest of the world as much pain as possible somebody who’s over the top worse than it a regular douche bag he’s the douche of all douche someone think they’re entitled arrogant selfish

You’re sure a huge douche canoe a flop, woman abuser, narcissistic, asshole that feels entitled feels like you don’t have to work. You can just mooch off of everybody piece of shit. Father doesn’t take care of any responsibilities and bitches and complains about everything that’s not given to them, arrogant useless heartless, and the only thing that they have going for them is their sexual attachment that their parents gave them a person that gets their dick from their mom and not their dad.

Man Ricky, why do you gotta be such a douche canoe?

by Dick Michael Miller March 27, 2025