Friction-less Wipe

When you wipe your ass, and the paper glides friction-less, so you know you're fucked.

John: Bro, you used all the toilet paper!
Doe: Yeah man, it was a friction-less wipe.

by Findrunemfwatertower March 31, 2025

Redneck Wet Wipe

When you're on the toilet taking a mean shit and you realize you have to blow your nose, so you grab some toilet paper to do so, then wipe your asshole with the now-wet and snotty toilet paper, thereby cleaning your asshole more effectively than just regular shit tickets. The best part is, unlike regular wet wipes, you can flush it without fucking up your septic tank or local sewage system.

Wife: "Honey, do we have any wet wipes? I've got the never-ending wipe happening here."
Husband: "Just blow you nose into some toilet paper!"
W: "Huh?"
H: "You know, like a Redneck Wet Wipe!"
W: "Gross, babe."
H: "Is it really any more gross than what just came out of your asshole?"
W: "Fair point." *honk*

by Crap-tain April 20, 2025

Nebraskan Bear Wipe

When you receive a blumpkin and when you’re about to splooge, the blower wipes your chocolate starfish with a disinfectant wipe to give it a burning sensation.

“Jessica gave me a Nebraskan Bear Wipe on Saturday and now my bum burns”

by Babyboo2026 February 28, 2026

Arabic Ass Wipe

The arabic ass wipe is when you take a crap and then sit ontop of anothers forehead. Then slowly move down their face till you hit their chin and it makes a long brown line.

“Dude, I took a dump yesterday and right after I gave my girl the Arabic Ass Wipe”

by TheBootyRipper March 2, 2026

Viet Kong Wipe

After a poop no matter how much wiping you do you can’t clear everything out. You know there’s more in the tunnel but you’re never able to reach it all.

I have some major itching going on this morning after a battle with a nasty Viet Kong Wipe.

by HouseFace May 23, 2025

San Francisco wet wipe

When you take a messy shit but don’t have any wet wipes. So you jerk off into the toilet paper and wipe your ass

That shit was so messy I had to use a San Francisco wet wipe

by Damon184 June 11, 2025

Wenatchee Wet Wipe

A Wenatchee Wet Wipe /wɛˈnætʃi ˈwet ˌwaɪp/ occures when one goes #2 in a porta potty that is on the verge of overflowing and some of the filthy water splashes back on their genitalia, perineum, sphincter and/or buttocks.

It is also commonly refered to as: Nevada Nutslap, West Virginia Waterpark, St-Louis Spit Shine, New England Claw Shower, Spokane Splash Back, Bismark Watermark, etc.

''I dropped a deuce in the porta potty and got a free Wenatchee Wet Wipe''

by The Flying Frenchman 13 November 22, 2025