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split peen soup

When you're all horny in your trailer at night and want to have a special fap, so you sneak into kitchen and grab a can of Great Value sweet peas. You open the can with your Dollar Tree can opener and dowse the peas in canola oil. You then proceed to fuck the can of peas, but because all of the products you use are cheap and you are poor and stupid, there's a jagged piece of metal on the rim of the can that suddenly splits your dick down the middle. BAM! Now you've got split peen soup.
Girlfriend: We haven't had sex in two weeks. What's wrong with you?

Boyfriend: I didn't want to say anything, but last week I had three servings of split peen soup..."
by Jack Atrophy August 6, 2022
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Split Pee Soup

When you're taking a piss but your stream splits into two.
Bonus points for unintended splashing.
Excuse me for a moment, I have to go make some split pee soup.
by seeamanaboutahorse November 27, 2024
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Devil’s Spit

During sex, before a male is about to ejaculate into his partner’s mouth, he pulls out a bottle of hot sauce and pours that in the partner’s mouth before ejaculating on their unpleasantly surprised face.
Yeah man, last night my wife was acting moody, so when we had sex I have her a little devil’s spit!”
by DontCallMePickle April 28, 2021
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split menu personality syndrome

Mary exhibits split menu personality syndrome as she places her drive-thru order, "Umm yes I'd like a Number 3 Value meal, super-sized with a small diet coke...oh yeah and add in an apple turnover"
by Happy Girly of course! February 26, 2010
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split the red sea

to have sex with a girl on her period
Guy 1: i just split the red sea

Guy 2: cool
by Paddy_Mac March 24, 2011
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Split Face Hair Shark

Vagina, pussy, twat, Etc...

Close relative of the Split Face Bald Shark!
I was walking drunk on the beach and almost stepped on a Split Face Hair Shark!
by RedWingsWin March 26, 2009
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Split the red sea

When a male has sex with a female while on her period.
Neil: Oh hey Johnny! i just split the red sea with Alyssa, man there was a lot of blood.

Johnny: Oh snap!
by fuckmeimfree November 22, 2011
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