Chronicles magazine

The magazine of American Culture and also the best magazine in print. Ticks off the left, the right, the corporate, and the power elite. Published in Rockford Illinois otherwise known as the worst city in the United States. Annual meetings take place under the name of The John Randolph Club.

Everybody who wants to know the news six months ahead of time ought to read Chronicles magazine.

by England phi beta gamma March 30, 2008

Bluntman and Chronic

The two main characters of the comic book written by Banky Edwards and Holden McNeil in Chasing Amy.

Also see Jay and Silent Bob

Bluntman and Chronic are based off of Jay and Silent Bob.

by tenaciousd6936 August 5, 2006

chronicled

The most extreme state of getting pwned; getting extremely owned usually by a pwner.

"dude i just got hit in the face... i got chronicled!"

by BobbyV April 1, 2008

chroniclogical

The way and rate at which time passes while under the influence of Marijuana.

After pounding a few beers and smoking a bowl of some fine kush, Johnny found himself feeling as if hours had passed, only to look down at his phone and see only 5 minutes had gone by. Time was passing by so chroniclogically from his perspective.

by DJSciurus September 23, 2009

chronic benchitis

When a member of an athletic team sits on the bench for so long that he develops an injury.

The other day I played a basketball video game and following the game I was immediately notified that Steve Novak was injured with back spasms. The problem was he was in street clothes and listed as inactive in the game he was supposedly injured in. He is one of the worst rated players on the game, and with the "injury", his ratings dipped further. He may never see the court again after this. Therefore, he really suffers from chronic benchitis.

by crazylegsdave January 13, 2010

Cronchy Water

Cronchy Water (n): a type of water sold in many shapes and sizes. It has no flavor, and when even heat from the air is applied for long periods of time, it loses its cronch. Cronchy Water is often also added to drinks due to its cronchiness, and ability to make drinks cooler just by being in its presence. When eaten, Cronchy Water has a sort of crunch to it not too dissimilar from ice, but better. Cronchy Water also has it's own dietary plan called the "Cronchy Water diet".

"Hey man, i'm going out for food. want anything?"
"Yeah just a Cheer-wine with just a little Cronchy Water."
"C- Cronchy Water?? you mean ice??"
"... no... ice is dumb. I mean Cronchy Water."

by The King of Trash November 11, 2019

Chronic noosing syndrome

Chronic noosing syndrome

Chronic noosing syndrome (CNS) is characterised by an individual’s urge to noose one’s poose at the slightest inconvenience.

Howard: “Jen my jarred pig eyes aren’t in the fridge”

Jen: “Yeh Howard, the council took them away in biohazard suits, you’ve got to stop eating that shit”

Howard: “Fine have we got any bilge rat soup left in the bathtub”

Jen: “No Howard, that shits back in the sewer where it belongs..”

Howard: “Well noose my posse. I think my chronic noosing syndrome is kicking in...”

*choking nosies*

by Count Noosula March 26, 2020