shasterbate

shitting while masterbating

person number 1: "oh wow Justin the football player, takes a long time in the bathroom"
person number 2: "hes probably masturbating while he shits"
person number 1: "haha, Justin shasterbates"
person number 2: "hahahaha thats clever. shasterbate!"

by shexcelent December 1, 2009

Shaftesbury

A hilltop town in Dorset. Home to an abbey, Gold Hill, Tesco, and Shaftesbury School, and not much else except woods, fields, cows, rather nice country people and retired war veterans.

The people of Shaftesbury can take pride whilst gazing from their hill at the neighbouring towns such as Gillingham and Sturminster Newton. By doing this they are reminded of their superiority from the fact that they don't live in an imbred squalour dominated by chavs.

Recently however, the chav, have been advancing on the hill of Shaftesbury. The recent influx is thought to be from Gillingham of which the vermin seek the nearest Tesco Supermarket.

Precautionary measures have not yet been taken by the town council - also known as the 'Chimpanzee Committee' due to the large presence of Chimpanzees imported illegally from Gillingham School on the board of councilors.

'Shaftesbury is the city of a dream' - Thomas Hardy

by elk_jjhf March 29, 2012

getting shafted

to get screwed or to have bad luck. to get the short end of the deal.

Ian:" can i have a ride to lunch?''

Lerman:'' fuck no"

Ty:" ha that bitch jus got shafted"

by da jim bob krew September 19, 2004

shafted

Getting screwed out of a deal

We got shafted out of leaving early

by Christy February 13, 2003

shattered

To be as tired as fuck

"I just ran 10k and am fucking shattered"

by Brendan October 10, 2003

Shaftesbury school

Absolute fucking aids. Ruled by mr farrer and mr I hillier and all the other cunts. Trust me you do not wanna go to that shithole of a school. It consists of wetties,smokers, and in general neeks. Poor smokers aren’t allowed up “smokers alley” anymore because some old lady keeps complaining about “fag buts”. Probably even shitter then gillingham school. If u go there u will get put on shitty report for no reason at all. But let’s get an F in the chat for all the smokers at the school.

Shaftesbury school is a shithole

by Donnyyyyyy October 16, 2019

workplace shift-shifter

An employee who is a master at flexing days and shifts to the point that nobody working with them really knows when the person is going to be at work.

I can’t possibly tell you when that workplace shift-shifter will be back into work!

by Dr Bunnygirl November 23, 2019