Jesus pimps

Jehova's witnesses.

The Jesus pimps stopped at my door again yesterday.

by Alan May 9, 2004

jesus christ on a crutch

meaning "ohh shit" or fuckk!!

"jesus christ on a crutch that hurtt!"
or
"JESUS CHRiST ON A CRUTCH that was rude!!like what the ef

by Elle and Cody! September 8, 2007

Purple Jesus

4. Nickname for rookie running back Adrian Peterson of the Minnesota Vikings.

The Vikings beat the Falcons thanks to a 60 yard pass reception and run by Purple Jesus.

by mphilg September 26, 2007

jesus bomb

The kind of bomb that Attack Mode Jesus would plant

that Jesus Bomb just won the map

by amj August 21, 2006

"Jesus wept."

John 11:35. The shortest verse in the King James version of the Bible. Translated from the original Greek, εδακρυσεν ο ιησους, literally meaning, "Jesus wept.". Perhaps the sole verse in the Bible that people actually "get" without guidance. Rarely open to interpretation, only cross-reference. Having said that, what many don't understand is that it may sum up the entire New Testament in two simple words. (Note: emphasis on the word, may.)

When someone starts to say what the Gospel according to John really meant when it said, "Jesus wept.", just walk away! It could be a money scam. Caveat emptor.

by Herr Doktor Grauwolf February 14, 2009

Jesusaurus rex

the super sayian version of Jesus

he that believeth in me, though he were dead, yet shall he live: And whosoever liveth and believeth in me shall never die or ill go Jesusaurus rex on yo ass!

by blank babushka September 28, 2009

jesus christ on a cracker

An exclamatory remark used to express surprise, distress, and outrage.

*In response to Matthew's CBT, Jack yells:
"Jesus Christ on a cracker!"

by Beau Weidman November 4, 2007