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jesus goggles

If you say that someone is wearing Jesus goggles, you mean that that person has been so on fire for God that they think someone is more sexually attractive because they too have the same level of passion for Jesus instilled in their heart:
"How did you manage to get such a beautiful girlfriend when you look how you do?"
"Brah pls- Jesus is my wingman"

""Why is she dating him, he ain't fly"
"Ahh man homie, she must have her jesus goggles on tiggggghhhtttt"
"Ahmen to that"
"Mmmmhmmm"
by uj6tyjhvj March 29, 2015
mugGet the jesus gogglesmug.

jesus seam

The Jesus seam is the vertical hemispherical ridge across a man's testicles implying this is where God welded or stitched him together.
I got kicked right in the balls so hard I thought I split my Jesus seam.
by Sicrowell May 19, 2016
mugGet the jesus seammug.

jesus fetish

1. a simp for Jesus, very Catholic maybe too much. Probably very overbearing to talk to.

2. If you have such a fetish, why and please consider seeing a psychiatrist, you sick fuck.
Son: Father, I think I've developed a fetish for our only Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ.

Father: It's great to hear that you have faith in God no-, Wait what?

Son: A Jesus fetish, Father!

Father: What the fuck is wrong with you? Get the fuck out of my house, you're not my son anymore I'm disowning you.
by Kazariiiiiiiiiiii-chan July 2, 2022
mugGet the jesus fetishmug.

Jesus rail

n.

The passenger hand rail above the car window. Used by people who can't drive, those who prefer to be in control, or frightened mothers.
(in car, Driver accelerates)

Passenger: Jesus! (holding onto car hand rail for dear life)
Driver: You don't have to hold onto the Jesus rail, I'm doing the speed limit!

Passenger: (holding onto car hand rail, eyes closed)
Driver: Stop holding the Jesus rail, I'm not trying to kill you!

etc.
by SilverGirl78 April 8, 2011
mugGet the Jesus railmug.

raptor jesus

A meme that rose to fame when it was the 900,000th post on 4chan's /b/ (which now has over 40 million posts). Consists of a raptor's head crudely photoshopped onto a picture of Jesus.
Raptor Jesus went extinct for your sins.
by adeb December 24, 2007
mugGet the raptor jesusmug.

raptor jesus

Just as jesus was the savior of man raptor jesus did the same for his dinosaur bretheren. See also denver the last dinosaur.
Man Bhudda could take raptor jesus!
by Drew Mcleod June 4, 2005
mugGet the raptor jesusmug.

Tranny Jesus

A Gay Icon that goes by the Pseudonym Conchita Wurst when not preaching to the masses. Closely related to Jesus Christ, the turn of the millenia jewish hippie socialist who taught people not to be assholes. Yet subsequently gets blamed for all the assholes who claim to follow him. Tranny Jesus is sometimes seen as offensive by people with no sense of humor, and homophobes.
I saw a Hottie down at Krispy Kreme, and Good Lord Tranny Jesus I nearly fainted.
by Slim Lyde-Prioleau November 6, 2014
mugGet the Tranny Jesusmug.

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