Nonce

That weird looking man you saw at the park as a kid

Im gonna keep my son away from that man i think hes a nonce

by Howamisupposedtoknow February 12, 2020

Cat Nonce

Someone who puts their middle finger up the rectum of a cat

Oi Tom, how many times do you need telling, get your finger out the cats arse! Stop being a cat nonce

by Manz a fish cuz December 16, 2021

Nonce

Sex offender, peadophile

That bloke Roy Pua, he’s a right nonce.

by GingerNinja2020 November 22, 2020

Bike Nonce

A man who rides his bike with a camera and either records kids or grasses on people to the old bill.

Jeremy Vines a bike nonce

by JezzaVee March 24, 2024

Nonce Nuggets

Werthers Originals sweets, sold in small boxes or bags. Purchased by the elderly, especially in a Petrol Stations. Great queue former, as they are usually placed right on the bottom shelf and it takes the elderly a fucking age to get up and down. Poor replacement for Simpsons travel sweets that are rarer than rocking horse shit at the moment, so much so there is no shelf space for them, great source of entertainment for an overworked and underpaid customer assistant!

“Three packs of nonce nuggets and a lucky dip for Saturday night.

“Certainly, and are you going to pay for that Daily Mail you’ve got folded under your arm or are you going to walk out with it like you did last week.?”
“Oh sorry, and by the way your forecourt is disgusting why aren’t you out in the rain sweeping up the puddles?”
“As you can see I’m on my own, and I now have a queue of 12 people, thank you so much, have a wonderful day!”

by Cacker Man April 1, 2023

Nonce

Someone who fiddles with kids

‘Caz when out with a 12 year old’
‘Yea a proper nonce’

by Gh0styy July 19, 2021

Nonce

nonce is a British slang word for a child molester.

That ginger twat Stephen Tries , he's a right nonce

by Salmon tastes like crap January 22, 2019