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Jared's Ears

Jared's Ears Is a genetical condition in which somebodies ears are literally ginormous. Some mistake a person with Jared's ears to be a bird or other flying specimen. Jared's ears is normally identified at birth because the ginormous ears are incredibly big at birth, and therefore make labor incredibly hard. Jared's ears only has one cure which is to cut the ears off, or trim them with a rotary sander.
Is that a bird dog, nah its a plane.

Shit. Nevermind, it's just a guy with Jared's ears
by Christophlak June 18, 2024
mugGet the Jared's Earsmug.

Jared

The epitome of laziness. Loves to fondle cats and touch their privates. When attacking a Jared, do not go for the head, because it is metal plated, you won’t phase him. Typically looks like they’re lost and walking in circles, but don’t interrupt them, this is how they think, and disturbing them could ruin their entire day.
Stop being a Jared.
by NickyRen October 18, 2022
mugGet the Jaredmug.

Jared

Jared is the most amazing boy you will ever meet. He is smart, kind, cute funny, and above all he is such a gentlemen. He will always give you a compliment and is the sweetest person EVER!!!! He will always make you smile and blush. He is super strong and loves to workout. He is a great boyfriend, husband, fiance, etc. If you get a Jared in your life you are or would be extremely lucky I know I am. Jared will support you in whatever you love and will always make you laugh. Jared's are amazing guys and any girl would be lucky to have one.
Girl 1: so who is the special guy?
Girl 2: Jared he is so amazing!!
Girl 1: I love Jared's i wish I had one :(
by cheerleader12 April 9, 2019
mugGet the Jaredmug.

Jared

Jared is mainly a name of a male
He is cute, funny, full of energy, klutzy, and has great hair! Jared is nice and not afraid to give his opinion, he will stand up for those he loves and doesn't take ANY shit!
Girl 1:who is that?
Guy 1: thats jared.

Girl 2: hes soooo hot!!
by mhbish November 22, 2019
mugGet the Jaredmug.

Jared

A guy who isn’t the best looking but makes up for it in other ways. He is trustworthy, fun to flirt with, the best person to make boring classes fun. Overall someone who makes you overall happy!
Jared made my day during math!
by JuliaO October 13, 2018
mugGet the Jaredmug.

Jared

Intelligent to a fault, hilarious, and willing to die to prove a point or make someone laugh. He's the rawest nigga God could create, and yet still a charming individual unless you get on his bad side. If you do, he'll likely get you injected with radioactive isototopes to die a slow death in a british hosptial. He's the Putin in your friends group.
Damn nigga, you a straight up Jared.
by DonkeyKong TacoMong August 29, 2017
mugGet the Jaredmug.

Jared's Fingers

The most gracious fingers known to man, known to make any man or woman bust upon sight. These fingers have fueled entire societal movements, and are some of the most significant fingers in history.
Nick: I think I'm going to hell
Saul: touch'a'my Jared's Fingers.
Nick: *ascends*
by No_Name_Bob December 19, 2022
mugGet the Jared's Fingersmug.

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