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Protect and Survive

An information campaign created by the British government during the cold war, designed to inform people of what to do in the event of a nuclear strike. Consisting of a leaflet and public information film (which was to be broadcast on national television during a national emergency), the campaign was heavily criticised for being fatalistic and bleak in tone. Especially in the instructions given on what to do if someone dies while sheltering from fallout, for example:

“If anyone dies while you are kept in your fallout room, move the body to another room in the house. Label the body with name and address and cover it as tightly as possible in polythene, paper, sheets or blankets. Tie a second card to the covering. The radio will advise you what to do about taking the body away for burial. If however you have had a body in the house for more than five days, and if it is safe to go outside, then you should bury the body for the time being in a trench, or cover it with earth, and mark the spot of the burial. ”

On the other hand, the campaign was criticised for being a waste of taxpayers money and misleading, even deluding the public into a false sense of security. As by following those instructions, the public assume they'll be safe. The booklet was never distributed and the series of films were never shown, hence comedians such as Ben Elton ridiculed it in shows like The Young Ones as useless and a waste of money.

While somewhat fatalistic, it suggested that surviving a nuclear attack was possible and desirable. This was lambasted by British radical communist historian, E.P Thompson, who wrote Protest and Survive in response.

The film was created by Richard Taylor cartoons (the same company that made the legendary Charley Says series) and was narrated by the Shakesperian actor, Patrick Allen. It consisted of Voice-over narration, stills photographs and simple (if somewhat kitsch) animation. It was very simple to follow and very clearly laid out, which made it more chilling to watch. However, Allen does have the comically patronising line:

"Oh, don't forget your tin opener and bottle opener."

The Patronising nature of the film, as well as its fatalistic tone and grim content was wide open for ridicule. Especially with it being at odds with the kitsch animation style. The Harcore punk band, Discharge, wrote a song of the name name, criticising the campaign. Comedians also ridiculed the leaflet and PIFs, attacking the percieved hypocrisy of the government creating the conditions for nuclear war, yet trying to placate the public and the critics of the propaganda campaign that a war won't escalate if the government has a nuclear arsenal (Mutually assured destruction's not mad enough?). HM government was effectively accused of fudging the issue , as the Bomb Episode in The Young ones illustrates:
NEIL: Seriously, we ought to do something about this bomb! I'm going upstairs to get the incredibly helpful and informative "Protect and Survive" manual! Nobody better touch this while I'm gone!

Neil discovers the bomb

RICK: What are you doing?
Neil is reading his survival manual while painting himself white with a paintbrush
NEIL: Oh, painting myself white to deflect the blast!
RICK: That's great, isn't it, Racial discrimination, even in death! What are these? indicates a few lunchbags on the table

Rick's arrival after making his demands to Maggie Thatcher

NEIL: Oh, sandbags!

The table now has a drape over it saying, 'KEEP OUT, FALLOUT'. Mike enters carrying food in both hands
MIKE: Neil, where's the table?
NEIL: Oh, good. You got the provisions.
MIKE: Yeah
NEIL: No, not on the roof man!, put it in the food zone! Anyway, it's got to be tinned if it's going to survive ten years of fallout!

Excerpts of The Young Ones episode, Bomb
by Chris Henniker May 31, 2006
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Post-flush surprise

A turd (seemingly with a mind of its own), which refuses to be flushed, for fear of god knows what. It sometimes intially appears to have been successfully flushed, only to reappear at the worst possible time (such as when your mother in law needs to use the lavatory).
Othon : (storms out of the lavatory, pointing in the general direction of the offensive odour arising from the unflushed turd). "Who was the dirty son of a bitch that left THAT in the toilet?"

Liz : (shrugs) "No idea what you are talking about. I had a number two, but I didn't just leave it in there. I flushed it"

Othon : "Either you're full of shit (figuratively AND literally) and you don't know how to flush a fucking toilet, or this is just another one of your post-flush surprises. Either way, I am not impressed. My shit does what it is meant to. Why can't yours? Get rid of it!".
by Macbeth the Wonderslave December 3, 2009
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the face a girl makes when shes sucking a guys dick; like a surprised clown
guy 1: so what did you get for your birthday?

guy 2: my girl gave me a surprised clown
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Surrey Jack

Indo Canadians who wear black air forces and a shit ton of Jordan clothing only wear black. Supposably the gangsters of surrey. With a silver chain
Akash sandu is such a Surrey jack
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Surface Warfare Officer

Easily the largest community of officers in the United States Navy, SWOs drive ships, launch missiles, oversee safety procedures, control the public affairs outlook of ships, plan tactics, conduct safety inspections, make sure the engines are running smoothly, stand watches, maintain weapons caches, ensure smooth power flow, throw everyone around them under a bus so they can sleep and/or get promoted, cry nonstop, attempt to commit suicide but fail because they have absolutely no energy, and much more. Basically, they do everything on a ship with the notable exceptions of: sleep, have free time, and enjoy their life.

Despite the financial, educational, and prestige incentives, the Navy has an extremely difficult time retaining SWOs because their lives suck so badly. It's generally the last choice of designators, filled by people who either have to serve in the Navy because it paid for their college, or lunatics who volunteer to be a SWO and almost immediately regret their decision.
Navy Pilot: Hey guys, wanna go to a bar after work?
Intel Officer: Sure!
SEAL Officer: Sounds like a good idea.
Supply Officer: I'm in.
Public Affairs Officer: Definitely!
Surface Warfare Officer: After work? Work never stops...ever...(cries)
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Surya

He was the most "Surya" person I've ever met.
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surprise cake

1: Buy cake mix
2: Take date rape drugs
3: bake Cake
4: ???
5: PROFIT
I am surprised by this surprise surprise cake. What a surprise. I am surprised omg. Surprise.
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