Old lady playin’ squat tag in an asparagus patch

When your homie starts laggin’ behind and starts being lazy as fuck

God damn it Jarvis, quit actin’ like an old lady playin’ squat tag in an asparagus patch and get movin.’

by Don’tbelievethehype August 1, 2020

squat cobbler

When one sits in a pie, and performs various actions made to turn the watcher on.

Dan what the hell are you doing in there?

Sorry just applying cream to myself.

Are you doing a squat cobbler again?

by Saul G. September 2, 2016

squat cobbler

When a grown man sits in a pie... For sexual gratification

Oh my god Michael!! That's an incredible example of the squat cobbler....

by Baldy64 August 17, 2016

Nut Squat

Adj- the act of working out the male genitalia in various forms of activities such as tea bagging, sexual intercourse, and blow jobs.

Plural adj- Nut squats/ nut squatting the act of performing multiple times. Nicolajai The Great Greek

My preworkout exercise consists of 20 nut squats in the locker room.

by JaiGuyBowie July 29, 2016

squat cobbler

The act of sitting in a pie and wriggling for sexual pleasure for the person watching. Crying during the act is considered even more arousing. (Native to Hoboken New Jersey)

"When he sat in the cherry pie, I nearly lost my mind! What a great Squat Cobbler!

by elvieandy August 30, 2016

squat cobbler

When a fully clothed man in a costume sits on a pie and wiggles around in it

Dan: What kind of pie do squat cobblers use?
Jimmy: I don't know. Peach, banana cream, not really my area of expertise.

by PatrickMcElephant August 30, 2016

Squat and Squirt

This is a bathroom phrase for sitting down on a toilet and pooping.

"Ok boys, this is where we're gonna squat and squirt!"

"I'm gonna go squat and squirt, be right back."

"Squat now, or forever hold your squirt."

by ToughGuy33 October 10, 2023