Uncle 

The handyman, child rapist, has a mustache, has hair only on the sides of his head above the ears in your family

Child: Uncle it's 1:05 AM what are you doing?
Uncle: *unzips pants and takes off underwear*
Child: OH GOD NO NO NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
*uncle takes a round at child's butt*

Uncle by TheTurtleOfLife February 27, 2019

Uncle 

The one person I don't want to like me. Yet the only one who does. Also destroyed my asshole at night. So if your my uncle.... Please apologize and pay for my therapy...

My uncle fucked me and my brother last night

Uncle by CandyFoxx April 13, 2019

Uncle 

A man with a very big basement and only cums on Christmas eve

My brother: Hey Uncle Randy
Uncle Randy: Go downstairs and bend over sweet cheeks.

Uncle by Oi cuntty November 21, 2019

Uncle 

Man who shuts himself out in his basement from his wife and kids and sustains a healthy diet of weed, faygo, and Destiny 2. He also likes to feed off the sorrow of others.

“Man look at that Uncle over there”

“Yeah, I’m pretty sure he’s high right now”

Uncle by Gay tomis November 26, 2019

Uncle 

1.The man who teaches you the things you didn't learn in school.

2. The man who shows you things you were not supposed to .

"Last night my uncle showed me where children come from" Said laura "Really? My uncle showed me that when I was 4" Replied Stacy

Uncle by An intelegent human January 20, 2020

Uncle 

Your parents brother whos job it is to constantly sexually harass you and rub you.

Look Jim there is an uncle over there. Let's hope he doesn't hurt you like last time he was horny

Uncle by Oaky dokey March 20, 2020

Uncle 

An Uncle is usually your moms brother(s) or your dads brother(s), unless it’s a very close family friend that you like to call your Uncle even though that’d be very inadequate. Uncles are the scummiest people out there. They all suck and have a stick up their butt, whether that be because of their work profession, their muscles, or for just no reason in particular because they suck regardless. They are as boring as a rock too, it’s way too hard to create a bond with them so you’ll just give up on trying. Most uncles will have been mean to you when you were just a youngin’ as well, and that really won’t change a whole lot as you get older. And if you don’t believe me that Uncles are the worst kind of people out there- why is it that there’s a lot of cases of uncles raping their nephews/ nieces. Ha! Scummy.

“Ugh, my uncle was being such an asshole to me!!”

“Oh man, sorry to hear.”

“Yeah brother, I’m convinced all uncles suck!”

“Yeah you’re probably right bro because mine do too.”

“Hahahahaahaha.”

Uncle by Poopoohahafunnybutt April 13, 2020