Get the Shitbiscut mug.Similar to a Fitbit around your wrist, this device goes around your waist. Every time you defecate, it will sense that you are about to excrete fecal matter and will start going to work. With its advanced detection system, this device will calculate the amount of snickers dropped in the punch bowl, total squeezes of the sphincter, and will even detect the development of hemorrhoids during the painful process of squeezing out your piping hot logs. At the end of the week, the device will send you a report of how many dumps you have taken each day. It will also recommend lifestyle changes if you are dropping the kids off at the pool too frequently throughout the week. This device is available for a price of $69.99.
Tyrant: Yo dude, my shits have been crazy lately. The tater tots I ate yesterday legit blew through me like a laxative. I bought a Shitbit to help me track how many times I shit per day and the number is astounding. On average, i shit about 4 to 5 times a day.
Big Easy: Bro you might want to see a doctor about that. It seems kinda unhealthy.
Tyrant: Nah dude, doctors are overrated. That’s why I bought a Shitbit. It recommends specific lifestyle changes and even gives you words of encouragement like Siri does sometimes.
Big Easy: Siri and I had sex once.
Big Easy: Bro you might want to see a doctor about that. It seems kinda unhealthy.
Tyrant: Nah dude, doctors are overrated. That’s why I bought a Shitbit. It recommends specific lifestyle changes and even gives you words of encouragement like Siri does sometimes.
Big Easy: Siri and I had sex once.
by Stoney69 March 6, 2019
Get the Shitbit mug.Related Words
shitbib
• shitbitch
• shitbaby
• shitbits
• Shitlib
• Shitgibbon
• Shitbin
• Shibibical
• Shibibiles
• shibibles
A fictional - but not unrealistic bathroom aid. When passing an abnormally large shit there should be a gum shield type device on a wall bracket or rope next to you - bite down when that mud child is making life unbearable. Can also be useful day after Halloween when half chewed nuts come out pointy like fucking glass shards.
“Man I dropped a Shamu deuce last night that would have wet the first 6 rows at seaworld. Had to bear down hard on my shitbit”
by Quagmire Ton bastardo November 14, 2019
Get the Shitbit mug.Kevin: Stephanie is SUCH a shitbitchcuntfuck!
OR
Thomas: WHAT DID YOU JUST FUCKING SAY TO ME YOU SHITBITCHCUNTFUCK
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Thomas: WHAT DID YOU JUST FUCKING SAY TO ME YOU SHITBITCHCUNTFUCK
by professional retard February 10, 2020
Get the shitbitchcuntfuck mug.n. An undesirable renter, who flies in, shits all over everything, and flies out, leaving the owner and neighbors to clean up their mess.
Those shitbirds have trashed the rental property next door. I hope they move out soon and take their POS trucks and mangy dogs with them.
by superlazy_ February 12, 2010
Get the shitbird mug.Noun: The lowest quality of bitch, one who leaves a taste in your mouth similar to that of a relatively large pile of shit.
"You are a shitbitch."
by Iamtheskyking April 23, 2014
Get the shitbitch mug.When gas combines with a steaming shit on its way of of the rectum it creates a bubble that looks like someone blowing a bubble with chewing gum.
while cleaning the litter box you notice what looks like a balloon sticking out of the side of a shit
( ShitBubble )
( ShitBubble )
by DerwoodBones November 22, 2010
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