cold turtle

Personal interaction that causes male genitalia to retreat as in jumping into an ice-cold pool.

When she told me she only liked donkey-dick, I quickly went cold turtle!

by Bald Ginger May 12, 2014

tempting the turtle

the act of subtly exciting oneself, by discreetly flicking the end ones knob, often in public.

1.Ethan. "dude it looks like that guy is playing with himself under the table".
Chris. "yea hes totally tempting the turtle".

2.Mitch. "oh my god I'm so board, i totally feel like tempting the turtle.

by spongecarrotsaysmoo December 6, 2009

Turtling Out

The act of being so high/drunk that once upon your back, you are rendered incapable of getting yourself back to the appropriate angle

"He was so high last night he had a full on turtling out episode"

by Sir Spliffsalot March 10, 2009

Loggerhead Turtle

The act of giving a blowjob in the ocean while the penis is completely submerged in water (usually just 3-4 sucks at a time between coming back up for air).

"Dude, take my advice: don't ask her for a Loggerhead Turtle when the waves are really big."

by Herbert Muffin September 11, 2015

tits on a turtle

Someone who is basically useless

She is basically tits on a turtle

by Curly March 22, 2017

Dirty Turtle

After you buttfuck Senator Mitch McConnell you make him go ass to mouth, that's the Dirty Turtle.

I was two miles up ole Mitch's dirt road when I when flipped him North to South and he gave me a Dirty Turtle!

by Echo One Romeo January 22, 2022

turtle rancher

Noun; Someone who makes situations/moments awkward by interjecting into conversations inorder to make someone make an awkward turtle.

Guy: hey did you catch that Celtics game last night?
Guy2: No I...
Guy3: two midgets just stole my ice cream, so i killed them with an ice cream scooper!
Guy2: *makes awkward turtle
Guy: Dude you're a major turtle rancher.

by Tucker Sampson May 20, 2008