Skip to main content

Jesus Spanking

when you do something that you know is wrong and God comes back to get you for it later.
1. Obama is a crappy president and makes bad choices....so Jesus spanked him when he got hit in the face during a game of basketball.

2. A child kicks another kid and then runs away. while they are running away, they trip and smack their head on a wall. That my friends...is a Jesus spanking.
by michelle1991 November 29, 2010
mugGet the Jesus Spankingmug.

spank wizzled

Man, am I spank wizzled....thanks Eader!!!!!
by Richard Deason March 28, 2004
mugGet the spank wizzledmug.

Royal leamington spank

This involves a lot of preparation and dedication.

Step 1) Shit and wee in a pint glass and blend it.
Step 2) Wipe it on your willy.
Step 3) Spank your partner with your pooey willy and let it dry (the whole pint must be used).
Step 4) The spanker then removes the crusty poo (which will now be in a bowl shape) and uses it to eat a beautifully prepared dinner.
Step 5) Cum on the dinner.

During this process the spanker must be wearing a crown and sing prodigys 'smack my bitch up' mixed with lemars 'time to grow'.
'Love, shall we dedicate our night to a Royal leamington spank?'
by penno May 3, 2008
mugGet the Royal leamington spankmug.

Spank me hard

A euphemism for fuck me used to express frustration; not to be confused with the "SPANK ME HARD!" which expresses the literal desire to be spanked.
Friend: Dude, your parents just died in a fire that burned down your house.

You: Spank me hard! My xbox was in there.
by lemontwisty December 11, 2010
mugGet the Spank me hardmug.

no spank bank directory

a list you keep of the two baggers, psycho women, feminists, butterfaces, reverse butterfaces and other such women you shouldn't date. this no spank bank directory can be shared with other guys in your posse to forewarn them that these women are not date-worthy.
i do my fellow men a service by keeping a no spank bank directory to protect men from these hose monsters who can get basic instinct on you.
by Chris Norton January 29, 2009
mugGet the no spank bank directorymug.

Spanked my Bacon!

Spanked my Bacon is an action packed statement used to describe the feeling of metaphorically being paddled on your bottom with overwhelming, stimulating and provocative information. Having your bacon spanked can potentially lead to creative spurts and intense exhaustion, later followed by a cigarette and if you're lucky, another round.
Wow! That concert really spanked my bacon!

Hey baby! Want me to spank your bacon? Here, hold my beer while I download.

A man in uniform really spanks my bacon!
by Madeline Laughs July 9, 2011
mugGet the Spanked my Bacon!mug.

spank dat ass

To desire to have hardcore sex with someone.
by ReaZonoZaeR November 30, 2003
mugGet the spank dat assmug.

Share this definition