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Hairy Noose

A term used to describe the effect on many unfortunate men of woman's greatest weapon. A weapon shamelessly wielded by a certain type of woman, effectively more often than not, to wickedly get her own way and reduce men to pathetic approximations of what they once were. The first sign of it's effect is typically when a male goes missing from weekly boys nights, card games, fishing trips and the like. More serious effects may even extend to a woman gaining access to such things as a closed male only WhatsApp group with understandly disastrous consequences.
Conversation over a beer:

Dude 1: What's happened to Joe? Haven't seen him for donkeys.

Dude 2: the dopey cunts fucked. He's shacked up with some ranga scrag who's been riding him to within an inch of his life. He's had a lengthy dry spell up to now so you can't blame him for dipping the wick but she's mad as a cut snake and won't let the poor fucker take so much as a piss without written permission. He'll wise up soon enough once he gets a decent look at her melon in the sunlight but for now he's well and truly caught in the hairy noose. I'd give him a month and we'll see him back. He loves the suds.
by SqueezyKneezy April 17, 2019
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Rogan Nosh

A blowjob performed after a substantial meal from the Indian Sub-continent.
Went for a curry the other night and on the way back, Jill gave me a Rogan Nosh; my bellend's still a bit nippy
by RosscoTheDestroyer January 9, 2021
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Related Words

To nooch

To tell a woman she should be more womanly by not showing she enjoy sex, and specially not post sexual memes

can be written nucc , and can be a name , for ex: he's the Nucc
-Man paul just told Amy to not post sexual memes as it proves she's addicted to sex and that's not a good image for a woman.
-oh wow, he totally nooched her
-yeah, he's the Nucc , he likes to nooch
by Not the nooch April 24, 2021
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Major Noose

Another name for a "Good Luck Chuck." That is to say, a person who breaks up with a person, and that person's next relationship ends in marriage.
Wow, Jason sure is a Major Noose. Every time he breaks up with a girl, she gets married on her next relationship.
by Wxllco July 16, 2022
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noo-noos and beep

who's ready to have some noo-noos and beep?
by local J October 9, 2022
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Hoodie noose

When you try to take off your hoodie and it’s not coming off and it strangles you
I tried to take off my hoodie and it hoodie noosed me
by Hoodie noose maker November 6, 2023
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Juice Noose

Cumming in a girl from the back while simultaneously giving her a rear naked choke till she passes out.
Yo bro I juice noosed Becky last night she was out cold for 30 seconds while still oozing.
by anonymous May 15, 2024
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