When a bunch of douche bags that have been telling you what color your underwear is LITERALLY while you walk down the road because its how security tech is SUPPOSED to be used, you stop wearing them, they get mad because they can't steal them and sell them to a prison. Basically, due to laser technology (something that does so many things there still isn't a limit yet) you get to be harassed but the same ones that ruin your life every single fucking time. on your 30th birthday they told you "no one wants old stem cells, so enjoy the next couple of ears because god knows we won't let you get married and the rest is cancer" --you enjoy you're time knowing they aren't lying because these are the people that have lasers in life. THEN they send a panties report, hopefully 700 pairs were enough because last run 699 barely made it. That honeydew list, makes me wanna get a melon baller and do it myself.
The panties police have a new schedule, my dad got a panties report the other day, perfect, stay inside from 4-10 or you'll be jail bait. If you look too nice, "you deserve it" and they don't stop till you believe it.
by tornadofullofpiranhas November 16, 2025
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by Christopher Diangelo April 13, 2009
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Well, it turns out your grandfather doesn't need lunch today; Too bad I had to sit through the Bowel Report to find that out.
by Arrackon May 29, 2010
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The Point is a spiritual place and the back cove a tranquil pond.
The Point is a spiritual place and the back cove a tranquil pond.
by Beach Lord September 22, 2011
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Have you read The Reaper Report from this morning? What is he talking about? It's like a bad car accident, it hurts to look, but you just can't turn away.
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