An ingenious scam developed by book salesmen in 0BC
They wrote a book called 'The Bible' which was a #1 Best Seller across the middle east and then spread across the planet.
'The Bible' tells the story of Jesus and all his pals.
These salesmen, and Jesus, slowly gathered a large number of followers and plotted to take over the universe.
They wrote a book called 'The Bible' which was a #1 Best Seller across the middle east and then spread across the planet.
'The Bible' tells the story of Jesus and all his pals.
These salesmen, and Jesus, slowly gathered a large number of followers and plotted to take over the universe.
1.
Friend: I just finished reading 'The Bible', it's awesome
You: Yeah, I hope there's a sequel
2.
Friend: Man, I hate those 'Door-to-Door Biblemen'
You: Give them a break, Jesus told them to do it.
Friend: I just finished reading 'The Bible', it's awesome
You: Yeah, I hope there's a sequel
2.
Friend: Man, I hate those 'Door-to-Door Biblemen'
You: Give them a break, Jesus told them to do it.
by Kellan Fisher June 29, 2009
Get the The Bible mug.A co-worker (usually a woman, sometimes a man) who talks all day long about retarded subjects and who's commentary induces vomiting
by Robert H dkjfdklfjdlkjf September 18, 2006
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the bible is violent as fuck, if the bible were a movie and god wasn't willing to make any cuts the mpaa would deem it violent enough to get an nc-17 rating, the bible would only play in certain art house theaters and only gross a small amount of money, upon the bibles release on dvd the bible would not be available at walmart, best buy, blockbuster and many other retailers, the bible would not be shown on cable often. the bible would soon be forgotten about as most nc-17 rated films are.
the bible is also the best selling book ever made. it contains more sex and violence then any book ever written. people known as catholics want for you to read this graphicly violent and sexually explicit account of supposed real life events so badly, that they will give you a copy for free at any church.
the bible is also the best selling book ever made. it contains more sex and violence then any book ever written. people known as catholics want for you to read this graphicly violent and sexually explicit account of supposed real life events so badly, that they will give you a copy for free at any church.
by online handle August 29, 2006
Get the the bible mug.1. Something that causes alcoholics to be become born again christians, then start drinking again.
2. Something Bush refers to but he cant read.
3. Is full of fictional stories, as Adam and Eve and a guy who lived inside a whale (how can you take this book seriously?)
4. Something people worship because they ignore science and listen to what mommy and daddy said because they're always right.
5. Purely fictional
6. Is disproven by evolution/big bang/laws of thermodynamics
2. Something Bush refers to but he cant read.
3. Is full of fictional stories, as Adam and Eve and a guy who lived inside a whale (how can you take this book seriously?)
4. Something people worship because they ignore science and listen to what mommy and daddy said because they're always right.
5. Purely fictional
6. Is disproven by evolution/big bang/laws of thermodynamics
christian: Im Sorry sir, but the bible says to lynch niggers.
african american: but the bible has no proof or says why you lynch black people.
christian: but your a nigger
dundundun
african american: but the bible has no proof or says why you lynch black people.
christian: but your a nigger
dundundun
by captainatheism April 19, 2006
Get the The Bible mug.1. Men who fib (lie) about their penis size to make women think it's bigger than it is.
2. A self described big penised man who in reality isn't.
2. A self described big penised man who in reality isn't.
by debannabelle June 14, 2009
Get the bibber mug.Christian religious text used to gain salvation through Christ and follow His word. Meant to create peace and spread kindness to all who read it and preach its words
by RidleyAnne December 24, 2020
Get the Bible mug.Slang for having sexual activity with someone & using the excuse of being religious, preferably with someone with the name of Jordan.
'Hey, I've got bible study tonight with Jordan.'
'Sorry Jasmine & Seazer, but my bible study with Jordan is far more important than feeding the homeless.'
'Sorry Jasmine & Seazer, but my bible study with Jordan is far more important than feeding the homeless.'
by Awesomality January 2, 2014
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