Heading for Alabama.

A synonym for "not going to happen" or "nope", similar to Hurricane Dorian.

"You want to come over for some kale salad and a Sex And The City marathon?"

"I don't think so. That shit's heading for Alabama."

by Danger Ape September 6, 2019

Selective hearing

When you're in a zone and you're only able to hear what your mind is focused on. Others think you're ignoring them when they talk but the truth is they failed to gain your attention first.

My wife swears I was ignoring her but I have selective hearing, my attention was on the TV and I was completely unaware she was talking to me.

by Zoned all the way out November 24, 2021

Selective Gay Hearing

when a person only hears or thinks he hears you when you make a gay or homosexual remarks about you, himself, or those around him

Friend 1: "hey tim you wanna go bowling with me and alyshia tonight?
what friend 2 heard :"gosh all I really want is a big fat cock up my gay ass"
friend 2 has Selective Gay Hearing

by ASSEATER6969696969696969 October 23, 2018

Hearing Aid Beige

That matt fawn colour that resembles nicotine stained cream paint, you only find the old NHS hearing aids in this colour as no self respecting person would pay good money to have any item of this dull colour.

her personality is so plain it could be described as hearing aid beige...

by Moggsy James July 1, 2010

Hearing-AIDS

What could possibly happen when you have unprotected ear sex.

George: hey man, did you hear about Charlie.

Mayo: No, what happened?

George: He got hearing-AIDS messin around with Gibby. He's such a chowda-head.

by silverlemur December 9, 2008

soap opera hearing

Similar to selective hearing. A condition in which someone is unable to hear anything in their immediate area, yet is able to hear things far away.

(in the same room)
R: T. is a real pain in the arse.
P: I know
T: Pizza?

(somewhere outside)
T: Did you hear that bird hatching?
R: WHAT?!
P: Classic soap opera hearing.

by pabslo September 22, 2007

Selective hearing

The ability that humans have, especially males, to hear selectively only what serves their interests, being conveniently deaf to what they don't like or can use.

"I asked John to take the trash out and then get a beer from the fridge; of course he went straight for the beer: he has selective hearing".

by SenoritaCynthia February 4, 2010