Guru day 

Those days when EVERYONE decides to come and talk to you about their problems and ask you for advice.

Gosh, I'm having a guru day today, didn't get any study done at all!

Guru day by GreenBlizzard April 6, 2011

guru block 

When a Narcissistic ex-teacher disowns a student for becoming an individual.
.

"Hey, you presenting at the convention this year ?"

"Nah. Got serious guru block.."

guru block by capsule May 28, 2016

guru seat

(n.) The center position on a three cushion couch typically occupied by a neophyte pot smoker who by virtue of his location is offered two tokes off a joint or a pipe for every one of his compatriots. Since the "guru" is usually too inexperienced to refuse a hit, he gets much more stoned than his friends resulting in endless fun at the "guru's" expense.

Friend 1: You're in the guru seat, so you gotta take a hit every time the joint comes your way.

Guru: Cool. You guys are awesome.

Friend 2: No, man. You're awesome. Now take another hit, bitch. Guru seat rules apply.

guru seat by evil adam May 15, 2009

Guru Gossip

Guru Gossip (sometimes Gossiper) is a messy, poorly run message board masquerading as an honest space where members can vent freely about internet and beauty culture, mainly Youtube MUAs comme Jeffree Star, Michelle Phan, or Jaclyn Hill.

There are endless threads devoted to a variety of gurus and Internet personalities where you slowly realize that it is nothing more than a circlejerk for lonely women to engage in petty, childish, high school-like behavior. Members are subtly encouraged to degrade their targets for their appearance, to invade their privacy by looking up addresses and contacts, and are constantly looking for ways to report them to law enforcement for things like buying purebred pug puppies or having too many kids.

All the while the gossipers will compare themselves to prove just how successful, prettier, and much nicer they are than them, which leaves you wondering how someone can be so rich and happy, when they’re spending hours a day ranting about assymetrical noses and sponsored trips.

Abigail: I found a thread on Danielle Mansutti on Guru Gossiper!
Tanya: You’re kidding, what does it say? Is it anything good?
Abigail: No, it’s horrible. They spent five pages fighting with each other because one person had the audacity to admit she thinks she’s naturally very pretty!

Guru Gossip by TauKitty June 12, 2018

guru effect

When you have a technical problem you can't fix, but when you try to demonstrate it to an expert, it magically goes away, leaving you looking dumb.

"My PC was bluescreening all day, whenever I moved my mouse, but when I tried to show the IT guy what was happening, it worked fine and it hasn't happened again. Total Guru Effect."

guru effect by Garignak December 13, 2014

Guru'ed 

verb: to have something explained or your actions corrected by someone who has far more knowledge on a subject then you.

highschoolers working out: "i think we need more weight"

80 year old buff man: "no, you are just doing it wrong! do it like this!" and walks away

highschoolers: "shit man... we just got guru'ed"

Guru'ed by theSwanmaster December 24, 2010

Guru Fetish Syndrome 

When one develops a sense of love, affection and infatuation for their teacher, guru and/or shaman. Although rare, it does happen and hopefully the sufferer will get over it in due haste.

Miranda: I just had this incredible retreat, but I can't quite get over my shaman, it's like I'm love-struck or something. It's getting annoying now, it's been, weeks and it's not going away!

Melissa: Oh that's just Guru Fetish Syndrome, don't worry you'll get over it.

Guru Fetish Syndrome by Lavinaura December 29, 2018