Assclams!

Some shit that you inadvertantly say when you're pissed about something.

Fucking assclams!!

by Ptolomy Fife February 27, 2019

Asscapper 3000

A tiny pistol placed in ones asshole as a self protection purcaution.

To use the Asscapper 3000

1. Pull pants down

2. Assume crab position

3. Clap ass cheeks to fire

Haley survived being mugged thanks to the Asscapper 3000

by Spoodz February 6, 2020

assaclapititus

Inflammation of the vagina/ass area from consistent abuse of regular “putting out” to men who never really value your worth because in the end, you’re just a slut.

Michael’s mother is always waddling around due to her assaclapititus. Seems like every week Michael calls another man DAD.

by JamoMuhFknJ November 21, 2020

assflap pants

The pants you see that one homeless guy on the A train in Chicago wearing. Oh, did I mention he smelled violently of spoiled milk and stale cumin?

"Did you smell that nigga on the train with the assflap pants? Homie was rank!"

by assholeripper69 August 13, 2022

Assflap Dicky Douche

Jen.

Jen is an assflap dicky douche.

by PL4TYPU5 December 6, 2023

AssCape

When you back out of a terrible situation using your ass as either a literal or metaphorical exit strategy. Can involve physically reversing away from danger, using thicc energy as a social shield, or dropping something so embarrassing that everyone forgets what they were mad about in the first place.

As the great philosopher kenny420g once said: "The ass is a place of escape so it's all the same."

"My boss caught me on Reddit during the meeting, so I pulled an AssCape—knocked my chair over backing up, caused a whole scene, and everyone forgot I wasn't working."

by 3nrRed January 6, 2026

Albuquerque ass clap

When a woman bends over in the downward dog position on the bed but instead of sliding it in you grab her ass cheeks and slap them together very fast and hard to the point she face plants on to the mattress in order to stop you

Kristi won't talk to me no more because after our date last night I gave her the old Albuquerque ass clap

by Domphuckery September 27, 2025