chuck one off

To engage in a solitary bout of onanism, to punish percy in the palm. To ask for a date with Mrs Palm's five lovely daughters.

"Ey up son, gonna chuck one off while I watch?"

"Sod off Mr Jackson."

by Jabo January 16, 2004

Thrown One Off

Male masturbation.

I arrived at Barry's, on the way in I caught a whiff. He'd just thrown one off.

by harry_ belafonte April 07, 2009

Burn one off

To set fire to ones flatulent gassy fart. Can be done alone or as a party piece. If done with a crowd of mates a competitive element may arise to see who can burn off the longest flame.

"Quick, Lend me your lighter" said Andrew, "I've been on the baked beans, sprouts and Guinness again so stand well back while I burn one off".

by monty3945 February 07, 2013

fire one off

To fire one off is to take a crap.

I hadn't crapped for a month, until I couldn't hold it in any longer and I then just fired one off.

by OliverS May 07, 2005

Squeeze one off

Male masturbation, generally when not at home.

"Lastnight at my mother in laws house, the meatloaf was so good I had to go to the restroom and squeeze one off"

by ChuckU.Farley November 08, 2008

Squirt one off

Squirting off a load, the completion point of masturbation

After watching a porno , Jon ducked into the bathroom to squirt one off.

by montyl January 22, 2010

thug one off

slang for masturbating

"Dude, I just saw the finest girl. Def need to go thug one off."

by KaityB April 23, 2006