This wonderful event starts out with a man sitting on a wall to show off his crotch to a woman he has a crush on. To show the woman that he is mating material, he will hump the wall in hopes of moistening her lady garden. However, he does not realize that humping the hard wall will stimulate his spinky and cause a great fall... of shit. The poopy will land below on the woman, and all hopes of mating will be crushed.
Tyrant: Yo boss, happy Friday. Any fun plans for the weekend?
The Boss: Yea I was gonna go to the Meat Market tonight for some juicy Italian sausage, but I accidentally Humpty-Dumptied my wife last night and I gotta make it up to her.
Tyrant: Bro... you’re gonna have to explain this one.
The Boss: Okay.. so I hopped on our little wall between our living room and kitchen and figured I would try to turn her on. Turns out.. I only turned on my shit wagon and inadvertently plopped a log right on her dome. Safe to say I won’t be getting dome for a while.
Tyrant: Damn dude I’m so sorry to hear that. Hope she doesn’t get POO-TSD from that. Next time wear your Shitbit, as it would’ve warned you that logs were a brewin’.
The Boss: Yea I was gonna go to the Meat Market tonight for some juicy Italian sausage, but I accidentally Humpty-Dumptied my wife last night and I gotta make it up to her.
Tyrant: Bro... you’re gonna have to explain this one.
The Boss: Okay.. so I hopped on our little wall between our living room and kitchen and figured I would try to turn her on. Turns out.. I only turned on my shit wagon and inadvertently plopped a log right on her dome. Safe to say I won’t be getting dome for a while.
Tyrant: Damn dude I’m so sorry to hear that. Hope she doesn’t get POO-TSD from that. Next time wear your Shitbit, as it would’ve warned you that logs were a brewin’.
by Stoney69 December 18, 2020
Get the Humpty-Dumptiedmug. One partner puts an egg (uncooked, in the shell) up their butt and the couple goes on a date. If the egg breaks, the partner with the egg gives head to the other and if it doesn’t, the other partner retrieves the egg and makes breakfast (after giving head).
by corub69 January 7, 2024
Get the Humpty Dumptymug. When you are hovering your ass over the toilet and the shit hits the lid of the toilet before sliding into it
Person 1: Hey man I was taking a crap at the office today and I made a Humpty Dumpty
Person 2: That sucks, Did you clean up the smear?
Person 1: No I left it, I'm not touching that shit
Person 2: That sucks, Did you clean up the smear?
Person 1: No I left it, I'm not touching that shit
by BirdKibble July 25, 2022
Get the Humpty Dumptymug. Humpty Dumpty sat on his balls, Humpty‘s big mouth went off the wall…all the ex-boyfriends and neighborhood men would never date humpty ever again.
by Shaggy6913 August 18, 2024
Get the Humpty Dumptymug. When you hump a girl presumably your date, then proceed to shit all over the bed, and make her clean it up.
Jack "Bro Natalie is a freak bro she wanted me to humpty dumpy her"
Steve"So did you??"
Jack "Hell yea bro"
A humpty dumpty is when you have sex with a girl then proceed to shit all over the bed.
Steve"So did you??"
Jack "Hell yea bro"
A humpty dumpty is when you have sex with a girl then proceed to shit all over the bed.
by Reese98 May 3, 2021
Get the HUMPTY DUMPTYmug. by My naptime July 7, 2022
Get the Humpty Dumptymug. When a someone is humping someone from the behind, and then carefully proceeds to take just the biggest dump on them. And I mean Taco Bell levels of crap, straight on the body. This could be intentional, but is usually accidental
Dude, how was sex last night?
Bro, I totally gave her the Humpty Dumpty last night!
That was totally sick!
Bro, I totally gave her the Humpty Dumpty last night!
That was totally sick!
by Gayvid2006 January 11, 2022
Get the Humpty Dumptymug.