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Jonsen

To be going through withdrawals usually associated with drugs. More specifically marijuana.
Got any pot Pip? I'm jonsen.
by Dudeman January 10, 2004
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The Johnson

The Johnson is when a man wakes up in the middle of the night, usually trying to get some booty, (not always, see examples below) and is rejected. When this happens, he proceeds to masturbate on his girl, in anger. There's three different known types of The Johnson.

1. The Johnson- Male masterbates on female then in good manor, cleans it up.
2. The Clean Johnson- Male masterbates on female in shower, water from the shower cleans her off.
3. The Dirty Johnson- Male is so pissed off because he is rejected that he masterbates on the female and leaves it there, for a nice surprise when she wakes up.
Erin got The Johnson on her birthday, she dosen't need a receipt for that!
by Topher Johnson January 12, 2009
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Johnson

Another word for a huge man part, the term you use when you slanging hella dick. Packing straight cock.

If this is your last name your are most likely well endowed and slaying pussy till you get HIV like Magic Johnson
I thought she was looking at my shoes but she was looking at my Johnson.

That girl is fine as fuck, I'm trying to give her this Johnson.
by DreamSZN March 18, 2021
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Duff Johnson

A drunk penis. Being able to perform longer then usual, due to a large amount of beer.
I was at the bar drining with my buddies the other day; when I got home, I bent my girlfriend over and gave her the Duff Johnson while watching The Simpsons.
by John New October 16, 2008
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Va-Johnson

1. When someone has a dick where their clitoris should be.

2. A dick that is less than one inch in length.

3. An extremely annoying person who follows cooler people and throws his loser friends away to try to be cool.
1. I wanted to fuck that girl but she is so big and manly I'm afraid she might have a Va-Johnson

2. "Dont tell anyone, but I measured my dick and it's a Va-Johnson!"

3. "Mike, stop being a Va-Johnson and stop following EVERYONE!"
by Fagkiller146 April 21, 2009
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Muddy Johnson

When performing anal sex and when you pull your dick out there is smears of shit still on it from the other person having shit still in their ass.
guy: WTF?! Why's there shit on my dick.
Women: Ooops I forgot to wipe. Guess you just got a muddy johnson.
by Kaemine June 16, 2010
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dalton johnson

When you accidentally get your girlfriend pregnant
Guy 1: dude I just pulled a dalton Johnson

Guy 2: dude that’s fucked up
by Block23 January 24, 2018
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