doin' it faux natural

to masturbate

I haven't had sex in 15 years. To get by all that time, I have been doin' it faux natural.

by Poetjester September 24, 2016

Faux Call

A fake phone call you take on your cell phone when either a.) you see someone coming you don't want to talk to, or b.) you want to end a conversation abruptly.

"That stupid ass mascot at the ballgame came over to fuck with me again!" "Fortunately I was able to whip out my cell & take a Faux Call and that goody bastard ignored me"

by Carl 26.2 January 17, 2017

faux jack

Also known as: fo'jack, 4 jack, forejack.

Superior diss to "jack off" stating someone is so much of a jackoff, he/she is not even WORTHY to be a jackoff; hence FAUX JACK, the fake jackoff. Also to be advanced by additional phrases (see examples).

"Stroke hard faux jack"
"Front to back faux jack"
"Mack on kojak faux jack"
"That's not even your dad; you're a faux jack"
"Hurt your back, bruising your sac faux jack?"

by Choisome December 25, 2012

faux invigordisastpublation

Masturbating in public in anticipation of a prediction of an Apocalypse which turns out to be wrong.

Man 1: There was a man in Times Square masturbating and yelling, "THE END IS NEIGH".

Man 2: So you mean he was faux invigordisastpublation?

Man 1: I dont know what that means but you sound smart so I guess yes, he was faux invigordisastpublation.

by Pseudonymimity Joe October 22, 2013

Faux-waiian

A Faux-waiian is a person that portends to be Hawaiian even if they have never been to the islands. They are often seen with Hawaiian Island and or turtle stickers on their vehicles.

Dave is such a faux-waiian, he acts like he is from the islands even though he has never left Detroit.

by please-me-please January 2, 2012

Faux Cawk

It's when a small penis male stuffs the crotch area of his pants to make it seem he has one, OR when a female who wishes she were a male does the same.

... so i grabbed him and realized it wasn't real, it was just a faux cawk

by Sizzilian November 24, 2011

Faux Shui

Fake or alternative version of Feng Shui. May be spread like a meme (such as Feng Shui itself), or may be perpetrated (as a crime) upon fad-following wannabes who have more enthusiasm than intelligence.

Also, the concept of interior design moreover.

An American investigative television program exposed several so-called Feng Shui experts using hidden cameras which revealed that these lack-luster furniture arrangers were nothing more than Faux Shui con artists who could do nothing to improve the appearance or function of the space.

by FuzzyBS July 6, 2011