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quota monkey 

A highway cop mainly engaged in writing speeding tickets while more dangerous driving behaviors are ignored, due to either explicit or implicit quotas set for his continued employment; one who values ticket revenue over public safety.
In the time it took me to change the flat for the distraught young mother, I watched a team of QUOTA MONKEYS a quarter mile away stop three unfortunates who'd picked up an extra 5 or 10 mph coming off a steep hill.
quota monkey by Teedog December 14, 2008
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Bread Monkey 

When a painting has the properties of a piece of bread, or a monkey. Sometimes both.
I went to the art show the other day, this one painting was totally a bread monkey
Bread Monkey by Zach and Lisa B August 5, 2008

ciatch monkey 

An asshole who just perpetrated an extreme act of douchbagness
Jesse: Dustin how could you fuck my extremely hot mom? You are a fucking ciatch monkey!
ciatch monkey by Yukzoo December 20, 2008

cake monkey 

a cake monkey is a bitch who loves makeup sooo much that she covers every part of her face like 10 times over and over

thats a cake monkey
guy 1:dude i saw like 7 layers of makup on her face

guy 2:what a cake monkey
cake monkey by cwilb November 4, 2009

Kael monkey 

A young child that is extremely quiet but inwardly brilliant. Usually has blue eyes and blond hair.
Wow! That baby is just so adorable!...Yeah! And he even programmed my TiVo! He's the best Kael Monkey on the block!
Kael monkey by Casky April 4, 2010

mango monkey 

White girls that go after samoan guys!
Man that girl is such a mango monkey
mango monkey by smadams May 4, 2010

Bidah Monkey 

Someone who denounces everything by saying it is "bidah" (innovation). A great number of these exist in Saudi Arabia, where it is believed that the practice originated.
BM: "What is this? Brother, Urban Dictionary is bidah! BIDAH!"
ME: "Dude, quit being such a bidah monkey."
Bidah Monkey by mamoul March 18, 2011