Prison Barber

On the prison hierarchy, prison barber is far from the top. Although it is more respectable than a prison bitch, mail carrier, or license plate maker, it still will not keep you safe from the occasional ass rape. If I am being honest, no job grants you respect in jail. The one thing that separates prison barbers from the rest of the working inmates is the fact that they are closely monitored by guards. Due to the wide variety of razors and scissors prison barbers possess, the guard at these penitentiaries will be on high alert, often hanging out with prison barbers for hours on end. With such close contact to guards in jail, other prisoners could see them as snitches or a suck ups.

So, instead of working long hours cutting hair, being insulted and threatened constantly by other inmates, and being closing watched by guards every waking minute of the day, just grab your favorite color bandanna, and join a gang. That will earn you respect, and make you less likely to get ass raped. The only down side is that you are less likely to get parol.

Tyron: Hey Leroy, cut my hair, bitch.
Leroy: Alight, son. Sit down.
Tyron: I seen you talking to those guards Leroy. You snitchin?
Leroy: Don’t be accusing me of shit like that.
Tyron: Shut up, prison barber. Meet me out side the lunch room after y’all cut my hair. I got some shit I want to shove up your ass.

by Bubba the Gimp April 4, 2022

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