Arabian Hemorrhoid Explosion

First invented by the great Zabeeblebooble al-Shabib Poopaloompa as a forbidden medical practice in 2374 B.C. and passed down through word of mouth alone, the Arabian Hemorrhoid Explosion is a highly advanced form of intercourse that is also classified as an act of terrorism.
To perform, one must first acquire a pipe bomb and fill it with pickled seaweed. It is important that the seaweed has aged for at least 9 days and has never been touched by a virgin. Soak the pipe bomb in a jar filled with a mixture of horse diarrhea and your own sperm for 15 minutes, then place the jar on the stove and cook until medium rare. The mixture should be a neon guacamole green by this point. Remove the pipe bomb from the jar and gently shove it up the anus of your partner/sworn enemy who has lots of juicy hemorrhoids. Detonate the pipe bomb by chanting the new version of the alphabet song ten times fast (this is most effective with a large group of choir students.) Upon detonation, the bomb should implode and create a singularity inside your victim's asshole. This is your cue to begin vigorously molesting the asshole with a long object, preferably a rolling pin. Continue molesting until the singularity unravels, causing an orgasmic explosion that eradicates all hemorrhoids within a 100-mile radius by displacing them into the atmosphere so that they rain down hours later on unsuspecting homeless people and their stolen shopping carts.

I gave Fred an Arabian Hemorrhoid Explosion, he is now wheelchair-bound and can only eat drink own greasy shart juice for the rest of his life

by beepboop mcdoopydoo July 19, 2025

Flag