Panini Press

The act of one placing one’s flaccid penis on the glass of a scanner/copier and firmly closing the lid. If done properly, the penis will look like a firmly pressed panini sandwich.

“What happened to Steven today?”

“He accidentally hit “reply all” mid panini press, boss got jealous.”

by Daddylongdick813 September 1, 2020

Full Dong Press

A "Full Dong Press" occurs when a male colleague approaches your desk and stands behind you while you're seated and working at you computer. As he leans in to look at the monitor, he presses his genitals into your shoulder causing you to shrink away in a desperate attempt to escape the unwanted pressure of his dong against your body. The discomfort of a Full Dong Press is much worse if the perpetrator is wearing shorts, skinny jeans, or athletic pants.

Dude, I've been violated. Johnny just gave me a Full Dong Press while looking at my invoice reports.

Josh is on his way to HR because he gave the new secretary a Full Dong Press.

by anonymous August 8, 2025

Press-On Nail Error

A clerical mistake, or "typo," that results from the operator wearing artificial fingernails, or press-on nails.

My Medicaid reimbursement payments were inaccurate due to numerous press-on nail errors.

by DC Dawg February 3, 2012

Spam Pressed Ham

Pressing ones bottom cheeks on a window of a stationary or moving vehicle

Oh Dear! looked at that 'spam pressed ham' thats just gone by!!!!

by Wally Von Wallington January 23, 2011

I’ll alert the press

sarcastic remark, indicating apathy regarding an unnecessary/uninteresting comment. See “alert the media” for similar meaning.

*dead silence*

A: I’m going to go to the bathroom

B: ….I’ll alert the press.

by gl.dot August 12, 2023

dragon press

A form of gay man sex when you put the tips of said penises together at the heads until you have a super saiyan dick experience

Carl and johnny spent all night dragon pressing and said it was great

by Pikachu thot July 14, 2017

Cleveland Press

The Cleveland Press is the male version of a Brazilian wax; except instead of waxing the hair, it's just straightened.

I was getting ready for a circle jerk with the boys, and buddy told me he'd spread my cheeks if I wanted. I went for a Cleveland Press to clean it up a bit, it was full of willknots.

by iPeeLoudInBushes February 9, 2024