A creepy stalker who watches children 24/7 and makes a “naughty list” the uses this list to choose which children’s houses to break into and steal milk and baked goods, which undoubtedly contributes to his obesity. We don’t know much about him, but this old (probably in his 1000s) creep has gained the trust of children worldwide. The only question is, “Is Santa Claus coming to your town?”
Me: Hey, I just heard something on the roof!
Macaulay Culkin: I’ll go get em.
Me: but what if it’s Santa Claus?
Macaulay Culkin: You’re right... I’ll bring extra bricks!
Me: good thinking! Now go put an end to that creep!
Macaulay Culkin: I’ll go get em.
Me: but what if it’s Santa Claus?
Macaulay Culkin: You’re right... I’ll bring extra bricks!
Me: good thinking! Now go put an end to that creep!
by iabast December 25, 2020
Get the Santa Claus mug.A man who gets off on watching children 24/7 and making a list of Those who are nice, and those who are “naughty” he uses this list to choose his targets and break into their houses. He is often depicted as obese due to the fact that he lives exclusively off of stolen baked goods and dairy products, but in reality he must be RIPPED from all of the walls he scales and he has to be fairly lean in order to squeeze down all those chimneys. Mose people believe he gets around so fast because of a majical slay and a team of flying reign deer with LED noses, but this is very unlikely because he would be so easy to spot. It is much more plausible that the child stalking creep with so many different names is actually riding around in a white van to blend in with the snow and to have room for all of his “gifts” that he’s used to gain children’s trust worldwide! The only question remaining is, “is Santa Claus coming to your town?”
Me: I think I just heard something on the roof!
Macaulay Culkin: I’ll go deal with it.
Me: Wait! It could be Santa Claus!
Macaulay Culkin: Your right... I’ll bring extra bricks.
Me: Good idea! Now go put an end to that creep!
Macaulay Culkin: I’ll go deal with it.
Me: Wait! It could be Santa Claus!
Macaulay Culkin: Your right... I’ll bring extra bricks.
Me: Good idea! Now go put an end to that creep!
by iabast December 25, 2020
Get the Santa Claus mug.A mysterious fat entity, said to dress in red clothing, that sneaks into houses and steals food. The common scientific name for this strange, rotund creature is "Homo holidayus". It is also known to enslave caribou to carry it's fat self to more food. One field study conducted near this creature's home base revealed another major fact: He also enslaves dwarfed human beings. Also observed was a caribou with a strange, glowing red nose.
Person 1: Did you hear about the cookie thefts last night?
Person 2: Yeah, they were caused by the infamous Santa Claus.
Person 2: Yeah, they were caused by the infamous Santa Claus.
by -_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_- January 5, 2021
Get the Santa Claus mug.A fat harry man that breaks into your house on christmas night. Drinks the sticky white stuff the fourteen year old leaves out in the fridge. Rapes you under the bed then gives you a sededation and puts you back to sleep, then he has an affair with your mother. Finally, he is every boys idol because he knows where all the naughty girls live.
by Karen's Acrylics October 21, 2019
Get the Santa Clause mug.1. Anal intercourse on or around the Christmas holiday.
2. Anal intercourse while the giver is dressed as Santa Claus.
2. Anal intercourse while the giver is dressed as Santa Claus.
After we finished wrapping the kids' gifts and placing them under the tree, my wife asked for a Santa in the caboose. So, I slid down her chimney and got soot on my Yule log. Ho! Ho! Ho!
by James Island thriller December 4, 2021
Get the Santa in the caboose mug.by biGweE Wee July 26, 2022
Get the santa clause mug.When you pound a girl in the ass, pull out a fudge stick and draw a beard on her while you sing "Ho, ho, ho"
by Deenis January 7, 2008
Get the Dirty Santa mug.