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we need to talk

When your boyfriend gets bored but decides to dump you nicely so he can still get a shag when it pleases him. Usually followed by the phrase I still want to be friends and it's not you, it's me.

What your mom says when she finds out you fucked your now ex-boyfriend.
Guy: We need to talk
Girl: *cries*
Guy: Look, it's not you, it's me, I mean I still wanna be friends... it's just not working out.
*Girl gets lots of cuddles of now ex-bf, goes home and peices together heart which is then shattered again after the discovery of his new gf*

Mom: Rebekah, we need to talk.
daughter:*panics and mutters 'oh shit, I'm gonna get a bollocking coz of that twat... and that cheap new tart of his... It hurts :'('* *faked innocence* Why?
Mom: Rebekah have you ever had sex?
Daughter then comes up with a lie which mother sees thru instantly
by Bekkalumz August 3, 2005
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i need to piss

when you desperately need to fucking piss
Mario: Time to take a piss
Goomba: What the hell are you doing
Mario: I'm taking a piss!
Goomba: okay but why aren't you jumping at me thats what you're supposed to do

Mario: I might do it fucking later.
Goomba: No I'm a motherfucking enemy you're supposed to jump at me!
Mario: Oki doki then let me pull up my pants first and then maybe I'll jump on you.
Goomba: Maybe? MAYBE? ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR FOCKING MIND? NO! JUMP ON ME NOW MOTHERFUCKER
Mario: but I need to piss
Goomba: ugh fine
by \/+{[me]}+\/ January 25, 2021
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all you need is a phone

What one says when someone else is leaving, but they don't need anything. The "phone" means that they may carry a cell phone in case the mother is wondering about the son or daughter.
Blonde Chicken: "What will I need to bring with me?"
Mom: "Don't worry. All you need is a phone!"
by Seshie July 19, 2009
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yo i need that shit

wen someone says they need something duh!
i need beyonce so bad i can taste her hot, sexy pussy running across my tongue
by tits mc`gee July 18, 2008
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Do you need a broom?

When someone is being belligerent it is appropriate for you to ask if they need a broom for the sand in their vagina.
by crowboy11111 September 29, 2010
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I'm a need you to do better

Phrase mostly used and originated in South Carolina. To mean some one needs you to advance themselves or try harder, so it becomes beneficial to them or another.
Roger: dang i missed this weeks homework again.

Joyce: c'mon now! thats the third homework assignment u've missed this week...I'm a need you to do better
by Caelen September 5, 2006
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we need to talk

What a gurlfriend tells her boyfriend when they did something worng or they are breaking up.
Rita telling Dean they need to talk about the way he drinks. or Rita telling Dean they need to talk because she had enough of his BS and it is over.
by Stephanie September 20, 2003
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