shit of a thousand wipes

when poop breaks off halfway out of your ass and you wipe away at the stump as if it were a wet pastel poking out of your asshole.
I wont be coming to work today as I've been cursed by the shit of a thousand wipes.
by Lunicus January 25, 2007
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Wipe my ass with it

When you can perform a task with no difficulties
Dude I'm stuck with maths can you help?
Yeah cool, let me wipe my ass with it.
by Genial1232 April 18, 2015
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Hillbilly baby wipe

When one is without toilet paper and or baby wipes, they must “hillbilly baby wipe” themselves. Simply spit on your fingers run them through your ass hole and you have completed the hillbilly baby wipe.
“ damnit frank we’re out of tp! Well don’t be a pussy just hillbilly baby wipe ya self!”
by Gbomb69 February 15, 2021
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The Jersey Wet Wipe

On St Patrick’s Day in a crowded bar in a women’s bathroom you pee on the only roll of toilet paper in the bar because you are from jersey and that’s how you roll.
The bitches were pounding on the bathroom door to hurry up so I gave them the Jersey wet wipe and bailed.
by KorinaRina April 17, 2019
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Hyperactive Wiping Disorder

A syndrome spawned by the Coronavirus causing consumers to overbuy toilet paper which has caused them to over-engage in wiping their rear ends.
Each and every member of my family has, one by one, begun to manifest the compulsive and frightening symptoms of Hyperactive Wiping Disorder.
by Dr Bunnygirl May 03, 2020
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Skype ‘n Wipe

Slang for the foul habit of attending a staff meeting online while using the toilet.
Although entirely socially unacceptable, his twisted judgment led him to believe that Skype ‘n Wipe was somehow OK.
by Dr Bunnygirl May 20, 2020
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Don’t forget to wipe!

A common send-off in the morning by one spouse to the other now that we continue to work long into old age and may need little reminders here and there.
Bye dear, have a good day and don’t forget to wipe!
by Dr Bunnygirl September 05, 2020
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