(This concept was originated in Colorado and debuted in Chicago)
As you are performing coitus in the doggie position on your lover's birthday (or anytime really) - Step 1. Light a candle and stick it into a cupcake -- Have at ready! Step 2. Slowly and gently bring the cupcake forward towards your partner's view. Step 3. Sweetly whisper 'Happy birthday' in your partner's ear. Step 4. (now this is the tricky part and takes precision timing) As you conclude your birthday whisper, swiftly remove your penis from your partner's vagina and abruptly insert it into the anus and provide one muscular thrust inward (trap ALL that air!). CRITICAL STEP!! - Once she rears back in shock from the surprise birthday entry, strategically position the cupcake WITH lit candle directly in-line of the beehole while simultaneously plungering your schwantz out with great torque, friction, and quickness for the best airy effect (chef's kiss). If done correctly and the timing is just right, this will extinguish the candle's flame all in one assertive, swiveling exit.
Now to Step 5 - At this point, your birthday girl may have thought the surprise was over -- but oh no. Step 5. After the candle has been properly extinguished, bring the cupcake back to your lover's view to make a wish! Step 6. As the wish is being verbally shared, begin to sensually smear the cupcake all over her face while singing 'Happy birthday to you....happy birthday to youuuuu...' ---- She'll never forget it! :)
As you are performing coitus in the doggie position on your lover's birthday (or anytime really) - Step 1. Light a candle and stick it into a cupcake -- Have at ready! Step 2. Slowly and gently bring the cupcake forward towards your partner's view. Step 3. Sweetly whisper 'Happy birthday' in your partner's ear. Step 4. (now this is the tricky part and takes precision timing) As you conclude your birthday whisper, swiftly remove your penis from your partner's vagina and abruptly insert it into the anus and provide one muscular thrust inward (trap ALL that air!). CRITICAL STEP!! - Once she rears back in shock from the surprise birthday entry, strategically position the cupcake WITH lit candle directly in-line of the beehole while simultaneously plungering your schwantz out with great torque, friction, and quickness for the best airy effect (chef's kiss). If done correctly and the timing is just right, this will extinguish the candle's flame all in one assertive, swiveling exit.
Now to Step 5 - At this point, your birthday girl may have thought the surprise was over -- but oh no. Step 5. After the candle has been properly extinguished, bring the cupcake back to your lover's view to make a wish! Step 6. As the wish is being verbally shared, begin to sensually smear the cupcake all over her face while singing 'Happy birthday to you....happy birthday to youuuuu...' ---- She'll never forget it! :)
My special lady, Betty, got the quiverjibbles after I laid a perfect Colorado Birthday surprise on her!
by horsetrough hank November 21, 2024
Get the Colorado Birthday mug.When your girl is eating your ass and you shart on her face getting the little specks of shit on her. Batteries not included.
Hailey: "OMG you won't believe it last night I hooked up with Hunter and he gave me a Colorado Mud Trumpet! It was awesome!!"
by AvalancheFan007 December 20, 2024
Get the Colorado Mud Trumpet mug.Related Words
NOUN: One who attempts style through poor quality merchandise but lacks quality genetics resulting in issues as basic as breathing.
by Phil McKracken again February 6, 2025
Get the Colorado Bulldog mug.A geographical strip of land that follows Interstate 25 down through the center of Colorado, with cities such as Fort Collins, Boulder, Denver, Castle Rock, Colorado Springs, and Pueblo surrounding or near it. These cities hold most of the population of Colorado and give transplants the ability to say "they live in the mountains" because they're usually over a mile in elevation. They love to hit I70 going west to "get out of the city" and just go to Vail and Breckenridge to ski and drink $11 Americanos.
This also includes taking highway 24 west to Woodland Park and blessing the town with ✨️traffic✨️ so dense that 2 miles takes an average 15 minutes to drive through on a weekend.
This strip is over-welcoming to Californians that ruin the beautiful state.
The average price for a 3-4 bedroom house on 4,000ft of land is now unaffordable to a normal family making decent money.
There are now Whataburgers and In and Outs in colorado to feed this infection.
Buying a firearm in this state is becoming increasingly more difficult by the week.
We don't have plastic bags anymore and stores charge the 10 cent fee for shitty paper bags.
If you're ever convincing someone to visit Colorado, have them see the beauty outside of this stank ass strip.
This also includes taking highway 24 west to Woodland Park and blessing the town with ✨️traffic✨️ so dense that 2 miles takes an average 15 minutes to drive through on a weekend.
This strip is over-welcoming to Californians that ruin the beautiful state.
The average price for a 3-4 bedroom house on 4,000ft of land is now unaffordable to a normal family making decent money.
There are now Whataburgers and In and Outs in colorado to feed this infection.
Buying a firearm in this state is becoming increasingly more difficult by the week.
We don't have plastic bags anymore and stores charge the 10 cent fee for shitty paper bags.
If you're ever convincing someone to visit Colorado, have them see the beauty outside of this stank ass strip.
Wyomingite: I'd like to visit Colorado, where's nice?
Coloradoan: Literally anywhere outside the Colorado Lib Strip
Person from Utah: Coffee sucks
Coloradoan: Literally anywhere outside the Colorado Lib Strip
Person from Utah: Coffee sucks
by CammySlammy April 17, 2025
Get the Colorado Lib Strip mug.The Colorado Mangina is a term for a male individual that is behaving in a matter that can lead others to believe that the individual is in possession of a vagina.
Ryan: "Hey did you see that Alan didn't want to play?" Barnoza: "Yeah, hes such a Colorado Mangina."
by weeweecolorado12 May 4, 2025
Get the Colorado Mangina mug.When the female defecates in your nose and proceeds to make you sneeze using her gucci hairs causing you to sneeze poop in her vagina
by Markus Willbot January 18, 2026
Get the Colorado Nose Crap mug.noun (extremely niche / hypothetical sexual fetish practice)
A makeshift single-tail bullwhip hand-braided from perianal hair (commonly called "anal hair" or "ass hair") that has been deliberately collected and allowed to grow over an extended period of time until a sufficient quantity is amassed for braiding. Once completed, the whip is used to administer impact play — specifically whipping the buttocks — during anal intercourse, with the intent of turning the partner's rear a bright red color through repeated strikes. The practice may apply to partners of any gender.
A makeshift single-tail bullwhip hand-braided from perianal hair (commonly called "anal hair" or "ass hair") that has been deliberately collected and allowed to grow over an extended period of time until a sufficient quantity is amassed for braiding. Once completed, the whip is used to administer impact play — specifically whipping the buttocks — during anal intercourse, with the intent of turning the partner's rear a bright red color through repeated strikes. The practice may apply to partners of any gender.
"She surprised me on our anniversary with an Colorado Bullwhip she'd been secretly braiding from her own stash... let's just say her cheeks were glowing brighter than a stoplight by the end of the night."
by Braiden Crackmore January 19, 2026
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