Golden Phallus Complex 

Like King Midas of greek mythology, a person with GPC believes their penis to be magical, witholding the power to turn a queer woman straight through intercourse. A common syndrome among straight cis men who believe lesbians only exist for their enjoyment.

Derived from an addiction to pornography and the inability to believe women can enjoy sex without his mighty member's participation and, therefore, a disease that causes great inconvenience to all sapphics.

Guy: "Hey, you're only a lesbian cuz you haven't had sex with me, I can turn you straight"

Girl: "Wow someone is suffering from The Golden Phallus Complex"

Golden Phallus Complex by suamaede4 August 3, 2022

Philosophic Phallus Aggrandizement

In Argumentation, the act of constructing a line of reasoning unreasonably, its construction built on a foundation of subconscious bias, in order to give the appearance of making a point, for the sole purpose of exaggerating one’s metaphoric genitalia while systematically minimizing their opponent’s.

“Ah, but you overlook another possibility yourself, that of the unison of divinity and insanity. Perhaps the nature of the Infinite is such as to be unquantifiable by the precepts of order, and thus chaotic at heart?

Then again, perhaps other great minds have overlooked these possibilities because they were more concerned with a logical analysis of the questions themselves, and less concerned with philosophic phallus aggrandizement? (D. Amadeo, Email to R. Piccirillo 11/29/06)”

Philosophic Phallus Aggrandizement by Robert Vincent Piccirillo December 1, 2006

Cranial-phallus Syndrome 

When a person is known for being a Dick-Head, They must suffer from Cranial-phallus Syndrome.

Cranium -> Head

Phallus -> An erect penis, a penis-shaped object such as a dildo, or a mimetic image of an erect penis. Any object that symbolically resembles a penis may also be referred to as a phallic.

Syndrome -> A group of symptoms that collectively indicate or characterize a disease, psychological disorder, or other abnormal condition.

Person 1: Ya' know? That guy's a real Dick-Head!

Person 2: He must suffer from Cranial-phallus Syndrome!

Cranial-phallus Syndrome by Porkins. March 26, 2012

stinkhorn phallus

A mushroom of the class basidiomycetes which disturbingly looks like a penis.

I saw a stinkhorn phallus growing in the prairie next to the college that I go to.

stinkhorn phallus by hkghk` December 9, 2007

Epic Phallus 

A variation on the common phrase epic fail, where the word fail is substituted with the word phallus. Can be used to describe a penis or just a hilarious failed attempt at something.

Becky rejected Tom's offer to make out last night.
Epic phallus!

Epic Phallus by Rohinian January 14, 2010

callous phallus 

A common symptom of an STD exhibited by a man.

"Dude, don't sleep with Gertrude- she gave Esteban a bad case of callous phallus!"

callous phallus by R-McMeezy November 16, 2009

cranio-phallus syndrome

Posho/ medical/ Latin name for being a dick head.

I do believe he is suffering from "cranio-phallus syndrome"...
I can confirm he suffers from "cranio-phallus syndrome"...
I think you should get in touch with "cranio-phallus syndrome" anonymous...
I'm so sorry. My "cranio-phallus syndrome" has flared up and I've made a complete arse of this....

cranio-phallus syndrome by Dr. Jarov Phannibatter January 22, 2014