Corporate Douchebag Speak

The typical jargon used by corporate executives completely out of touch with the peons actually doing the work. Will refer to six sigma, core values, team effort, denominators, profit sharing etc. Meanwhile they are clueless as to how real world operations occur.

Mark the new CEO came in and gave the all-hands meeting a company overview. Unfortunately it was just a bunch of Corporate Douchebag Speak. He's off to Hawaii while I'm pulling OT.

by GodzilllavsMothra February 22, 2014

corporate gameboy

A Blackberry or other PDA to which members of the corporate world become addicted and are often seen rattling away at their keypads in public places like airports, trains, coffee shops, etc. Like portable video games for kids, these devices take over their owner's lives.

I walked up to the airline gate and found my boss and another co-worker urgently thumbing in data to their corporate gameboys as if entranced by this evil machine.

by J Russo October 9, 2007

Corporate Spy

Someone who uses covert and illegal means to steal trade secrets such as a proprietary product specification or formula or information about business plans

"He's Zach Ruane, a corporate spy! The greaterst corporate spy in the whole wide world. A corporate spy is someone who uses covert and illegal means to steal trade secrets such as a proprietary product specification or formula or information about business plaaaaaaaaaaaaans!" - Aunty Donna

by TheRookie__ March 12, 2018

corporate hegemony

Corporate influence over the masses. The ultimate goal is to have the masses, or sheeple if you would, completely stripped of critical thinking so that we can be controlled and manipulated like consumer puppets. Have us all addicted to pop culture and media so that we never question what our fearless leaders in Washington and Wall Street are doing to better themselves at our expense.

Here you go Martha and Jed, have another sip of the corporate hegemony Kool-Aid. You wouldn't want to actually get your news from an unreliable source that is not owned by MSM corporate interests would you? Don't go all conspiracy-theory on me now; don't forget we have plenty of TV to watch tonight .... you know how I can't stand where I actually have to think for myself.

by TruthseekingMerican November 25, 2013

Corporate Magic

Magic the Gathering played with the Magic 2010 rules changes.

Player A: What are you doing? Combat doesn't use the stack anymore.
Player B: I don't play corporate magic.

by ApplesPotatoGardner July 8, 2009

corporate masturbation

Any blatant and/or pointless flaunting or exhibition of a company's name, or ridiculously obvious product placement with the capitalistic intent of selling more of said product.

Ted Rogers' renaming of the SkyDome to the Rogers Centre was clearly an act of corporate masturbation.

by jasonisjericho May 31, 2006

Corporate twat

An expletive or profanity used when referring to or addressing those within the realms of a blue chip corporation, business or PLC. In fact anyone who is business oriented to the extremes of management strategies and business luncheons or lower management with an ego far beyond their authoritative perimeter. They are usually found lingering around motorway service stations or adjusting their cheap suits in outdated 80's office block mirrored windows.
Every office usually has a collection that seem to hang around together.

"you/they are all corporate twats"
"I can't stand their corporate twattery"
"I'm never taking a corporate twatting - I'll walk first"
"My boss is a corporate twat"
"He/she/those belong amongst corporate twats"

by jez price February 14, 2007