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constipatience

To become resigned to the fact that you won't be able to defecate until your colon decides it's ready to.
Patient: "I took the laxatives you gave me but I still haven't been able to go to the toilet."
Doctor: "Well, your bowel will evacuate when it's ready. You'll just have to learn constipatience."
by Matti! Matti! Matti! May 15, 2013
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constipation hangover

When you still can't take a quality dump days after a heavy night of drinking.
...on a side note, your boy hasn't dropped a deuce since that Jack fucked me up on Sunday. This fucking constipation hangover is no joke at this point...
by LeDeau September 27, 2017
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Romantically Constipated

Being entirely unable to engage romantically in a healthy fashion, either through the person's own fault, their own simple dislike of romantic relations, or the stupidity of their romantic choices. Most often, it is used to describe someone who leaves a relationship once things become more emotional. It can also describe someone who repeatedly engages in harmful romantic relationships, however.
You only left her because you started to feel something for her. That's what always happens with you - you're romantically constipated.
by hollyed January 3, 2011
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conflict constipation

Conflict constipation occurs when you really have to poop, but cannot because of a conflict, usually social or schedule related.
Joe: I have diarrhea but I have to be at school in five minutes!

Bob: Looks like you have a severe case of conflict constipation!
by joebob13 October 14, 2012
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photographic constipation

a phenomenon where a beautiful person appears to be in a state of discomfort, almost as if they were constipated, when they know their picture is being taken.
"Chandler what is the matter with your face?" - Friends s7e5

"Did you check out the prom pics? What's up with your face, you look like you have a case of photographic constipation."
by Manrique May 19, 2016
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bandwidth-constipation

a disease that has historically plagued many ISPs but is now mostly in history books
Before google fiber (medicine) was launched, most ISPs suffered from a bad case of bandwidth-constipation.
by Jumbled McGobbledygook December 21, 2020
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constiplating

contemplating a bowel movement
You know that famous statue,The Thinker? It looks like he's sitting on a toilet constiplating.
by wolfbait51 February 20, 2011
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