A pre-statement that allows for any possible offensive or derogatory remark you are about to declare. As long as the offensive remark has this pre-statement in front, it is assumed that the declarer is not to be held accountable for the repercussions of the statement to follow. If this is declared post-statement, the safety net is somewhat removed, the statement loses some girth, and the speaker can be held accountable to the spoken words.
Example 1 Pre-statement:
John: "No offense Betty, but you are the worst employee in this entire company and no one enjoys your presence. Also, I do not find you physically attractive and I think you are a bitch."
Steve: "Dude, how can you be so harsh!?"
Betty: "Don't be such a prude Steve, he said no offense first; it's cool bro."
Example 2 Post-statement:
Mike: "Wow Cindy, I cannot believe you slept with everyone on the 3rd floor, you are such a slut; no offense."
Cindy: "OMG."
Tim: "Mike - you're fired."
John: "No offense Betty, but you are the worst employee in this entire company and no one enjoys your presence. Also, I do not find you physically attractive and I think you are a bitch."
Steve: "Dude, how can you be so harsh!?"
Betty: "Don't be such a prude Steve, he said no offense first; it's cool bro."
Example 2 Post-statement:
Mike: "Wow Cindy, I cannot believe you slept with everyone on the 3rd floor, you are such a slut; no offense."
Cindy: "OMG."
Tim: "Mike - you're fired."
by Joey Fizzle May 4, 2016
Get the no offense mug.by misnon122 December 19, 2009
Get the offense mug.The noun form of being offended. When someone is offended by something you can describe their "Offension"
"WHAT YOU'RE SO MEAN"
"wow did you notice that crazy level of offension"
T"You're just like Geoff"
N"Ouch, No I'm not"
G"Wow I'm offended by you're offension"
"wow did you notice that crazy level of offension"
T"You're just like Geoff"
N"Ouch, No I'm not"
G"Wow I'm offended by you're offension"
by G-Shawty October 3, 2007
Get the offension mug.A basketball term made popular by YouTuber “Chris Smoove”. It is when a players defense is so bad you target him every play. Whoever he guards is whoevers gonna score.
by Sshsuucfkg July 22, 2021
Get the Whoever Offense mug.Things that people don't find funny because they are fucking pussies who can't take a joke! Some people would even call it "racist". Well shame on them!
Some offensive jokes include:
1. How do you know when a woman is going to have a black baby?
When she takes the tampon out, all the cotton is picked.
2. What do you call a group of white men running down a hill?
An avalanche.
What do you call a group of Mexicans running down a hill?
A mudslide.
What do you call a bunch of black men running down a hill?
911, there has been a jail break!
3. What's the difference between Michael Jackson and a grocery bag?
One is made of plastic and is dangerous for kids to play with, and the other is used to carry groceries!
1. How do you know when a woman is going to have a black baby?
When she takes the tampon out, all the cotton is picked.
2. What do you call a group of white men running down a hill?
An avalanche.
What do you call a group of Mexicans running down a hill?
A mudslide.
What do you call a bunch of black men running down a hill?
911, there has been a jail break!
3. What's the difference between Michael Jackson and a grocery bag?
One is made of plastic and is dangerous for kids to play with, and the other is used to carry groceries!
by J-to the Dizzle January 19, 2019
Get the Offensive Jokes mug.An offensive meme is a branch of internet meme that has no limits or rules, and therefore any criticism that it is subject to is nullified as long as it is branded an 'Offensive Meme.'
by RoyceTarantino December 19, 2019
Get the Offensive Meme mug.When a dick is so erect that it becomes an offensive machine, quickly but swiftly having intercourse with an nearby women or men.
by Dino Marcockass March 1, 2018
Get the Offensive Dick mug.