Someone sexually oriented to the movable articles in a room or an establishment that make it fit for living or working.
I.e. a person who completely lacks sexual interest in anything human, much less alive. But, unlike someone or something that is asexual or simply of other orientations or fetishes that don't involve living or human targets, a furnisexual desires to and probably attempts to fuck chairs, tables etcetera.
The term is also thrown around by "normal" people for a cheap laugh or shock value.
I.e. a person who completely lacks sexual interest in anything human, much less alive. But, unlike someone or something that is asexual or simply of other orientations or fetishes that don't involve living or human targets, a furnisexual desires to and probably attempts to fuck chairs, tables etcetera.
The term is also thrown around by "normal" people for a cheap laugh or shock value.
"I'm so sorry about what happened to the new leather couch but I wasn't under the influence of any substances or attempting some pathetic form of masturbation. Mom. Dad. There's something I need to tell you. I'm a furnisexual."
"My rents are on their way home to bitch about all the shit I did this weekend. While I'm arguing with them I think I'll slip in a bullshit confession about being a furnisexual. I'm not sure if they'll be amused and it'll lighten the impact of the other stuff or if they'll put me in serious therapy and/or drug me up heavily but either way I win, right?"
"My rents are on their way home to bitch about all the shit I did this weekend. While I'm arguing with them I think I'll slip in a bullshit confession about being a furnisexual. I'm not sure if they'll be amused and it'll lighten the impact of the other stuff or if they'll put me in serious therapy and/or drug me up heavily but either way I win, right?"
by Mebpitwe Istadamaus March 24, 2004
Get the furnisexual mug.When your upstairs neighbor is moving furniture in such a way that you confuse it for thunder.
Sometimes, furniture thunder is so loud, that it is in fact mistaken for real thunder.
Sometimes, furniture thunder is so loud, that it is in fact mistaken for real thunder.
"Gary, did you hear that? Is that thunder I hear?"
"No Beth, that's Eric upstairs again. Just some late night furniture thunder."
"No Beth, that's Eric upstairs again. Just some late night furniture thunder."
by Medicus007 August 16, 2016
Get the furniture thunder mug.Related Words
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Sexual foreplay act executed by packing baby powder into your ass crack, then ripping a fart into the face of your partner causing a dry cloud of hot talc laden stench to send her to orgasmic climax.
Girl- "Hey Jill. Your face looks pale, are you Ok?"
Jill- "Oh God I'm GREAT! Johnny hammered me with a dusty furnace. My eyes burned for a minute, but it was incredible!"
Jill- "Oh God I'm GREAT! Johnny hammered me with a dusty furnace. My eyes burned for a minute, but it was incredible!"
by JB 058 December 17, 2013
Get the dusty furnace mug.by TankDaBain August 23, 2018
Get the Furni mug.by sellinchocolate June 29, 2010
Get the furnophiliac mug.Furniturd n. , (pl. , furniturd). A useless piece of furniture (junk) that one plans on eventually dumping on a sidewalk, or leaving at a Goodwill donation drop-box.
"Oh no you don't! You are not leaving that piece of furniturd in the house."
This bookcase is missing at least two shelves and the drawer in that desk has collapsed. Time to take this furniturd to the dump.
This bookcase is missing at least two shelves and the drawer in that desk has collapsed. Time to take this furniturd to the dump.
by toast_melba August 27, 2011
Get the Furniturd mug.That old lady over there must have let her girls hang back in the day cuz she got furniture disease now.
by Burnerjack August 1, 2016
Get the Furniture Disease mug.