Wanker's Cramp

Noun

A painful stiffening of the muscles of the hand, characteristically caused by excessive amounts of masturbation.

Wanker's Cramp is likely the most pathetic accidental self-inflicted injury of all time, being just slightly above paper cuts from toilet paper, balsa wood splinters, and pressing the button on Bop It too vigorously.

Jim hasn't left the house for almost 5 days. It's only a manner of time before he gets Wanker's Cramp.

by IQuarent July 22, 2014

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Writer's Cramp

1 n. A painful spasm experienced in the muscles of the fingers, hand or forearm, while writing with a pen or pencil.

2 n. A severe contraction of funds in a writer's bank account, caused by an unreliable source of income.

I was signing cheques last night for all my bills and got a terrible writer's cramp.

All my cheques came back NSF. I guess my account has writer's cramp.

by Cranky Neighbor August 6, 2010

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Fat Kid's Cramp

noun: The pain that you endure will doing strenuous cardio activity.

Oh, man, I should not have had those hotdogs I now have a Fat Kid's Cramp.

by ZappaGnat July 7, 2011

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Speller's Cramp

A grammatical affliction common among users of email, online chat, and text messaging, wherein the afflicted deem themselves too busy and too stupid to spell correctly.

"Were u at? Met me at the mal after wok and well go shoppeng. Oops. I got serous Speller's Cramp! LOL."

by tbonewilson July 21, 2009

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Cock sucker's cramp

Typically a mouth breather. When the person goes about their day with their mouth slightly open and never fully closed.

Tommy has cock sucker's cramp. He walks around and does his shit with his mouth half open all the time. Probably from sucking so many cocks all the time.

by CMBC June 25, 2009

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