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computer

A machine consisting of a CPU, mainboard, hard drive, optical drives such as DVD and CD, sometimes floppy drive, monitor, video card, sound card, speakers, keyboard and mouse and lots of other shit.

At one time used for scientific research, they evolved into office machines for writing documents and organizing information. Computers are most often used for Internet access and to chat online with friends, and play games like Unreal Tournament, Grand Theft Auto, Doom, Quake, Descent and others.
My computer runs WinXP. It doesn't crash as much as it did with Win98.
by shadowhawk April 25, 2004
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computer

a complex structure of microchips and wires which allow communication without having to look at, hear or even know the person you are talking to
also known as: shit box, porn machine and that thing that fucks up my life every time I go near it and yet I still buy a new one every single time i beat the shit out of my current one
"i am going to beat the living shit out of my COMPUTER with my bare hand while using the other hand to jack of to the picture of britney spears i just printed off"
by afro joe June 12, 2005
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apple computer

"Apple Computer may have screwed up a few times over the years, but at least they knew the century was going to end."
Douglas Adams on Y2K
by some1else July 5, 2003
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computer

what you are on right now (unless, of course, you're on an iPhone/iPad)
Guy 1: i went on urbandictionary.com today because i felt like looking up random shit.

guy 2: what did you look up?

guy 1: computer.
by Chowderz March 20, 2011
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Computer

Computers: My Anti-Roofy.
by LilithXIII May 20, 2011
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Computer

One who computes.
Bob: What is your occupation?

John: I'm a computer. I solve math problems.
by Punstar February 14, 2012
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AP Computer Science

A programming class that also emphasizes object-oriented programming methods, algorithms, and problem solving. Also you try to learn something useful but your teacher leaves half-way through the semester, so your old Computer Programming teach with zero experience takes over and helps in no way possible. You try your best to pass but no matter what, you're going to fail.
Jacob: You do the AP Computer Science homework?

Kyle: Haha what homework?

Nick: Why even do it? No one is passing with this goof teaching the class.
by nobrows April 28, 2017
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