stranded turtle

an action of an overweight person laying on their back who is forced to rock themselves into an upright position.

fat jesus called for help and when no one answered he did the stranded turtle

stranded turtle by bizarrojesus January 21, 2010

drunken turtleneck 

When one is so slizzard, they unknowingly and accidentally put their head through the armhole of a shirt.

You must be fuckin' ripped, you just gave yourself a drunken turtleneck. You put your head through your arm sleeve... you look like Quasimodo.

drunken turtleneck by thatdude540 September 29, 2013

wild turtle 

the act of entering the turtle exhibit of your local zoo, and waving your penis around for the turtles to nip at.

I really love going into the turtle exhibit and wild turtle by letting them try to nibble my weenie!

wild turtle by WildTurtle69 February 15, 2014

Brown Turtleneck 

The way an anus looks when being stretched out by a man's penis.

This butt pirate was wearing a brown turtleneck all night last night!

Brown Turtleneck by Teh Duder December 2, 2014

Treason Turtle 

Moniker or nickname for Republican US Senator Mitch McConnell of Kentucky. This is due to his failure to bring election security bills to a vote; his wife’s scandal involving $78 million in grants; his hijacking of Federal Court appointees; and previously-sanctioned Russian steel producer Rusal’s construction of a $200 million steel facility in Kentucky. The company is owned in part by Putin ally, Russian oligarch Oleg Deripaska.

Mitch McConnell is not acting in our best interests - that Treason Turtle is just lining his own pockets.

Treason Turtle by Big Grinder June 28, 2019

fat turtle ass 

nice/ juicy

thats a fat turtle ass right there

fat turtle ass by willy scott November 19, 2020

Kitten Turtle

Noun.

A person who is cute and adorable like a kitten and moves slow like a turtle.

Kitten Turtle behaviors :

1. Says will be ready in an hour but their hour really means 3 hours. 10 minutes is 30 min. 30 is an hour and a half... etc.

2. Makes cute sounds and says words in a cute way when they make a mistake.

3. Counsels themselves when they have mental breakdowns

4. Will ask cute questions/make cute comments, examples:

"Did I leave the stove on?" when she didn't even use the stove.

"The cat didn't get in the oven, right?"

*Person bumps into them* them: "I'm so sorry" (basically everything is their fault and will apologize)

Kitten Turtle by KitTurd June 19, 2023