Nearmal

One who is normal adjacent. More normal than weird but not considered traditionally normal.

The friend group was made up of several core players with a few nearmal cohorts sprinkled in for variety and entertainment value.

by B3 aR January 26, 2023

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Near hit

Similar to a near miss, used in a mocking sense.

Hey there J-man, nice near hit!

by Sneedonym February 18, 2023

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nearlywed

Gender-inclusive alternative to bride and groom. "Nearly" + ( "Newlywed" - "Newly" ) = "Nearlywed"

My nearlywed party will wear blue and orange. The nearlywed? Yeah, they're getting ready in the other room. I'm hosting my nearlywed party at the casino!

by SenshiUsagi March 17, 2023

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Really? I wonder where he came up with that!

Hym "I'm thristy... I think I'm going to buy something to drink-"

Idiot "OH! That gives me an idea! I'm going to buy something to drink! Maybe a soda or something! Isn't that brilliant!? Isn't that a brilliant and original idea that I just had?"

Hym "Nigga... I just said the shit a second ago..."

Idiot "Right but I came up with the idea to buy a drink."

Hym "After I said the shit... Like, immediately after I said it."

Idiot "Wh... Well, that's not what's important. What's important is that I came up with this idea, right, and it has nothing to do with you."

Hym "How does it not?"

Idiot "Um... Well... What would me getting a drink have to do with you?"

Hym "No that's a sort of verbal slight-of-hand your doing there. I'm obviously talking about you making the claim that you came up with the idea... That you explicitly got from me... You didn't think of shit. According to the world most highly credentialed psychologist you aren't even capable of thought."

Idiot "Look... I have great ideas all the time man. This isn't new for me. I have all these thoughts floating around and I'm just so brilliant. And great minds think alike. So if I thought of getting a drink, a great mind like yours would probably come up with it at, like, exactly the same time. Right? Like we were vibing on the same frequency and BAM! We just came up with it at the same time."

Hym "No motherfucker. You heard me say the shit AND THEN you decided to ALSO do what I was doing... AFTER the fact."

Idiots "Well, I mean, look at all these drinks I bought! I have like 100 drinks! You only have the one drink!"

Hym "Because you have a million dollars and I don't you fucking idiot. You took my idea and used the million dollars I do not have to buy more than I can afford."

Idiot "Yes."

Hym "And you're trying to use that as evidence that you had the idea first."

Idiot "Y... Er... I did have the idea first! Just a split second before you said it! Really! You have to believe me! My entire career from this point on depends on me having claim to this idea! You shouldn't be trying to blackmail me like this! You're nefarious!"

by Hym Iam April 12, 2023

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