jungle asian

a slur used against southeast asians

"hey what are you?"
"im a jungle asian"
"excuse me"

by jungleasian April 21, 2021

Asian Parents

They are total douchebags that have total and utter control over your life.

1.

Asshole dad: YOU MUST GET HAIRCUT TODAY NOW! YOU HAIR TOO LONG! SO UGLY!

Me: Why can't I look the way I want?

Dad: YOU LOOK LIKE GIRL! DO YOU WANT PEOPLE THINK YOU GIRL?!!?!??!?!?!

Me: How is 3 inch long hair girly?

Dad: NO MATTER WHAT, YOU MUST GET HAIRCUT TODAY! OR I TAKE YOU LAPTOP AWAY!

Me: ... *gets a lopsided haircut that makes me look like a fucking nerd. Asian parents fail. *

2.

Faghead dad: Did you do your homework today?

Me: Yeah

Dad: did you do your homework today?

Me: Yes.

Dad: did you do your homework today?

Me: YES!!!

Dad: WHY YOU YELL? YOU HAVE NO RIGHT TO YELL AT ME!

Me: Well obviously you couldn't hear me so I had to yell

Dad: SHUT UP!!!

Me: Fine...

Dad: YOU ARE THE STUPIDEST KID EVER. *beats*

3.

This is a true story. I was in 4th grade, and my mom was trying to teach me how to add fractions. I didn't get it at the time, and here's what happened:

Mom: Do #1

Me: *does it, gets it wrong*

Mom: WRONG! HOW YOU FORGET? DO THE COMMON DENOMINATOR!

Me: I'm trying!

Mom: WATCH!!! *does problem, expects me to magically know how to do it* Now do #2

Me: *still doesn't get it, gets it wrong*

Mom: STUPID! DO THE COMMON DENOMINATOR! *bitch slaps*

Me: *sobbing* I don't know how!

Mom: *angrily does the problem, and breaks the pencil in the middle* SHARPEN IT!

Me: *sharpens*

Mom: Now do #3!

Me: *gets it wrong. How does she expect me to learn this stuff in a day as a 4th grader?*

Mom: YOU ARE THE MOST STUPIDEST KID IN THE WORLD! *goes in a bitch slapping and punching frenzy*

Me: *ends up with lots of bruises*

4.

Fucktard dad: *watching '24' with me* This is the stupidest show ever. All it does is label chinese people as bad guys

Me: ... There are american terrorists too...

Dad: This is the most unrealistic stuff ever. Bullshit. How does jack survive everything?

Me: How come martial artists in chinese movies can fly? Unrealistic much?

Dad: Shut up

by iHateAsianParentss April 19, 2009

Asian Sensation

a superhuman of asian ethnicity.

look, it's tastuma kunimoto the asian sensation.

by Foop88 October 12, 2009

asian pride

A term used to combat other 'pride' groups, allowing Asians to band together to preserve their status, culture, heritage and respect. Unknowingly causes the stereotyping of many Asian cultures into one generic one, ironically eliminating the point of having something like "asian pride". Members of this generic culture call themselves "azns" and forget the differences between their nationality and other Asian ones.

This 'azn' group is often known for its love of rice, import cars, and Asian celebrities (ex. Yao Ming, William Hung).

"got rice bitch? azn pryde 4 life"
"hahah William Hung rocks! asian pride!"

by ShinsengumiRocky February 6, 2006

asian keeper

A person who takes all the Asian new kids under his/her and has a whole heap of them.

Look at Jenny she's such an Asian keeper she already has twelve of them.

by LorRawr April 21, 2009

Asian Sense

The ability to tell what kind of Asian a person is eg. Chinese, Korean, Japanese, etc.

George-"Damn dude look at that Chinese girl in the skirt, ridiculous donk"

Stoph-"That chick is Korean idiot"

George-"How the hell do you know?"

Stoph-"Asian Sense dude, try and get some"

by C-Prizzle August 16, 2010

asian heaven

Where an Asian will not be beaten for receiving an a- or lower on a test and are not shunned upon for failing to become a doctor at the fine age of 16.

*in Asian voice

Mom: what you get on test today?

Me: I got b pwus

Mom: oh that fineee, I give you cookie now. You in Asian heaven now.

by Asian Boi January 14, 2014