Carpet fitter

Someone who walks with their arms out to the side to make themselves appear harder, while in reality, showing off what a tiny dick they have.

A carpet fitter will walk with their arms out as if they are carrying two rolls of carpet

Look at that p**** walking like a carpet fitter. He thinks he's hard

by 123rodney123 November 12, 2018

Carpeted Bathroom

Worst thing to exist ever. A girl from my theatre class has a thing for them. Why?

Carpeted Bathrooms shouldn't be a thing

"Look at all the mold in my Carpeted Bathroom"

by TheatreCrackhead September 26, 2019

carpet candy

A woman that is found attractive to lesbians (and men).

Damn girl, you some fine carpet candy!!

by smokinsena June 30, 2016

Shit carpet

A carpet upon which one or more individuals shits.

You remember that guy named Johnsy? What a total shit carpet.

by UptownToodeloo February 16, 2020

carpet yachting

When the dog drags it itchy hoop along the carpet in search of relief.

FFS, your fucking dog is carpet yachting again. You can clear up the brown tram line this time!

by halfmanhalfninja August 3, 2017

Shnoze Carpet

Another way of saying Mustache.

Holy crap that's a fucken mint Shnoze Carpet

by JWazza October 31, 2019

Carpet Guppy

A carpet guppy is a girl that likes eating other girls out. They usually swing both ways, and will also suck a dick if they are presented with the opportunity.

Bro 1: “Bro did you hear that Kassandra is a fucking carpet guppy?”
Bro 2: “No fucking way bro she just sucked my dick last month!”

by Testeacles April 1, 2023