Holiday. On September 12th, the citizens of the Earth must masturbate twice as much as they usually do, on a daily basis, to make up for not masturbating in respect of those men and women, killed on 9/11.
Joe: I feel really bad, i really need to masturbate, NOW!
Hoe: No, you can't, you have to wait for Masturbation Day, then you can jerk off LOADS!
Hoe: No, you can't, you have to wait for Masturbation Day, then you can jerk off LOADS!
by Colesey.21 September 14, 2009
Get the Masturbation Day mug.by Anonymous March 15, 2003
Get the masterbating mug.The common act of one who touches oneself to produce a pleasuring feeling in the groin area which almost always ends up in ejaculation. This is accomplished with the help of some form of visual or audio stimulation or just plain imagination.
beating off; harping on the cyclops; unmasking the self serve pump; launching the meat missile; whacking the flesh flute; Masturbation;
Person 1: Dude, Sheldon masturbates 9times a day..
Me: dude.. hes gonna have alot of kids..
Person 1: Hey, what are you doing later?
Person 2: I figure I'll masturbate til I pass out.
Person 1: Dude.. Sheldon is in the hospital.
Person 2: How the ??
Person 1: Yeah, turns out he ejaculated until his actual testicles came out
Person 2: Well, I guess that's what 9 times a day got the horny bastard.
Person 1: Dude, Sheldon masturbates 9times a day..
Me: dude.. hes gonna have alot of kids..
Person 1: Hey, what are you doing later?
Person 2: I figure I'll masturbate til I pass out.
Person 1: Dude.. Sheldon is in the hospital.
Person 2: How the ??
Person 1: Yeah, turns out he ejaculated until his actual testicles came out
Person 2: Well, I guess that's what 9 times a day got the horny bastard.
by Risown November 10, 2008
Get the Masturbation mug.by Newworldchic May 30, 2013
Get the Masturbation mug.Touching one's genitals to get pleasure.
Man: Touching cock, rubbing it until you groan and cum.
Woman: Stick fingers in, pump and hit g spot, rub clit, moan and scream and orgasm (squirt)
Man: Touching cock, rubbing it until you groan and cum.
Woman: Stick fingers in, pump and hit g spot, rub clit, moan and scream and orgasm (squirt)
Man: I rubbed my big cock slowly, as I groaned in pleasure, watching several videos of porn of fucking MILFs. I was so horny, I looked at my crushes instagram and was so turned on. I pumped my cock, up and down, groaning in pleasure as I imagined a tight pussy throbbing around my pulsing cock. I groaned as I cummed everywhere, fapping away in pleasure.
Woman: I watched porn of sexy men with abs, and was so horny, I fondled my tits, moaning as my nipples became hard as fuck. I ran my hands down and ripped off my pants as I rubbed my clit through my panties, soaking the thong. I moaned as my thong became transparent as of all the pussy juice dripping out of it. I thrust my fingers inside my tight pussy, pumping as quick as I can, screaming as I hit my g spot, rubbing my sexy clit as I imagined a thick long cock inside me, shivering as I thought of daddy spanking me, and screaming as I squirted everywhere.
I am rubbing my clit right now; I love masturbation.
Woman: I watched porn of sexy men with abs, and was so horny, I fondled my tits, moaning as my nipples became hard as fuck. I ran my hands down and ripped off my pants as I rubbed my clit through my panties, soaking the thong. I moaned as my thong became transparent as of all the pussy juice dripping out of it. I thrust my fingers inside my tight pussy, pumping as quick as I can, screaming as I hit my g spot, rubbing my sexy clit as I imagined a thick long cock inside me, shivering as I thought of daddy spanking me, and screaming as I squirted everywhere.
I am rubbing my clit right now; I love masturbation.
by CATTSSS October 22, 2018
Get the masturbation mug.One time I was really fucking horny in the shower for whatever reason. I didn’t have the restraint to just let it go so, I masturbated. I started massaging my clit and rubbing faster. It is wasn’t getting any better till I remembered the vibrator I have. I immediately grabbed it and ran it over my pussy trying to find the clit. I laid down in the bathtub and spread my legs. I held it there as long as I could moaning and screaming in pleasure. Before I could even begin to process the feeling, I was a shaking mess with cum all over my thighs.
by anonymous February 25, 2023
Get the Masturbation mug.Overly intensive self gratifying procrastination, thought and contemplation for a subject not necessarily warranting such effort.
by Diamond Tee April 9, 2009
Get the mental masturbation mug.