certified abstinence instructor

A life-calling for a precious few, incredibly optimistic individuals who think that it's actually possible to bridle the massive force of copulation using reason, logic, gods wrath, consequence or any other easy to ignore methodology.

I'm a certified abstinence instructor; das right! I don't care how worked up their loins be ge'in, a few pictures of god's herpes curse will shrink that hard-on faster than a busted cherry on prom-nite.

by YAWA August 19, 2017

Certified User of New Technology

This is an acrostic term for cunt. Used mostly in technical environments

The boss broke our servers and made me stay late to fix them, he's a Certified User of New Technology...

by silvaplom June 4, 2010

Certified lover boy

A boy who catches feelings easily.

I’m like drake, a certified lover boy

by CLB April 19, 2022

certified poop nigga

the realist poop nigga out there fr ong.

a certified poop nigga prolly got many hoes and is always chasin da bag✅😈

“Omg did u see zak today, he’s definitely a certified poop nigga!!”

by Sigmadaddy March 26, 2022

Certified exeh

A name given to lsk guys that use slang as a hobbies especially dandies

I'm certified exeh for days

by Certifiedexeh August 9, 2023

certified

something that has been found to be of high quality, something that is both excellent and somewhat esoteric.

the doom band brien just started is fucking certified.

by Reincremation July 28, 2006

Certified Trapper

best milwaukee rapper alive. Creator of music.

Have you heard of certified trapper, I heard that he invented music!

by MarcusTooSwaggy January 30, 2023