telekom

The shittiest ISP that ever touched the earth. Don't try to play a videogame while you have telekom, you'll not have any fun at all, don't try to watch videos, they won't load, not even fucking minesweeper works when you use this piece of crap. If you want to try out telekom, be prepared to have 900 fucking ping AT BEST on all videogames, I'm not fucking kidding, and their costumer support literally hangs up when you call them.

Person1: Why does person2 lag so much?
Person2: Unintelligible gibberish.
Person3: He has telekom.
Person1: This match is lost.

by Mironinja4 May 26, 2017

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telcome

Telcome, the meaning of welcome in the language of grace..

Welcom mr. telcome
Or
Telcome very much

by Telcome September 14, 2020

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telecumference

The act of masturbating while working remotely (particularly during quarantine). This may involve watching porn in lieu of logging into a Zoom meeting.

Dude, my wife walked into my home office and caught me with my pants around my ankles in a telecumference.

by anonymous October 15, 2020

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telecone

synonym for telephone that can be used as noun

-see telepine

"Hugh just sent Alex a sexy text from laura's telecone."

"Quick, telepine my telecone so you can hear my new ringtone"

by notkatie January 25, 2009

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telecon

noun: a telephone conference whereby your life force is inexorably sucked out of your asshole while your ears are assaulted by the droning of some corporate or government lackey. When accompanied by Webex or Virtual Meeting, it becomes the office equivalent of water boarding.

Slave 1: Dude, did you dial-in to the management telecon this morning?

Slave 2: Yeah - 90 minutes of my life I'll never get back

by paddyoski March 4, 2010

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